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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Pie chart bellow give information about the house hold expenditures of an average vs family in different years. summarizes the information by selecting and reporting the main features

Pie chart bellow give information about the house hold expenditures of an average vs family in different years. summarizes the information by selecting and reporting the main features
#bellow #information #house #expenditures #years #features
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The two pie charts illustrate the comparison between Japan and Malaysia
household
Use synonyms
 spending in five different categories.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that in Japan, the most
household
Use synonyms
 expenditure was
other
Change preposition
on other
show examples
 goods and services,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest rate was spent
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
. In Malaysia, the housing sector made up the highest contribution to
household
Use synonyms
 expenditure, whilst
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 became the
last
Linking Words
 segment. In terms of Japan's
household
Use synonyms
 spending, the largest portion was allocated to other goods and services at 29%,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
 followed by the food sector contributed 24%. Interestingly, the figures for housing and transport were almost the same at 21% and 20%, respectively.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the output from
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 was the smallest at 6%. Regarding Malaysia's
household
Use synonyms
 expenses, the top three picks were Housing (34%), Food (27%) and Other goods and services (26%).
In addition
Linking Words
, the contribution from Transport and
health
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 were 10% and 3%, consecutively.
Submitted by mfmakarim55 on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words household, health, care with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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