Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
In modern society, being self-employed is increasingly becoming a trend.
However
, this
choice also
comes with certain drawbacks. This
essay will analyze the reasons behind this
growing trend and discuss the potential disadvantages associated with being self-employed.
One primary reason for the rise in self-employment
is the desire to alleviate stress associated with traditional employment. Employees often have to deal with company regulations and commuting issues, which can be sources of significant stress affecting both physical and mental health. By choosing self-employment
, individuals can avoid these stressors and instead
focus more effectively on their careers. This
autonomy allows them to manage their schedules and workloads more flexibly, which can lead to increased job satisfaction and a better work-life balance.
However
, despite these benefits, self-employment
also
comes with a higher risk of financial instability. Leaving a secure job means losing a steady salary and benefits, requiring individuals to find other ways to support themselves financially. Statistics show that there is an increase in the number of bankruptcies among the self-employed, indicating that not everyone is well-suited for this
kind of work. The challenges of managing all aspects of a business, from marketing to finances, can be overwhelming and risky, particularly for those without prior experience or a strong support network.
In conclusion, while
the appeal of reduced stress and greater autonomy makes self-employment
an attractive option for many, it is not without its risks. The potential for financial instability and the increased risk of bankruptcy are significant considerations. Therefore
, individuals should carefully evaluate their personal circumstances and capabilities before deciding to pursue self-employment
as a career path.Submitted by daniellin0717 on
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task achievement
Your essay touches on relevant points, but integrating more specific examples and statistical data would strengthen your arguments. For instance, mentioning particular industries where self-employment is common or providing concrete statistics could help illustrate your points more vividly.
task achievement
While your ideas are clear, you might benefit from slightly more detailed explanations in some parts of the essay. For example, discussing the mental health benefits of self-employment in more detail could enhance your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay flows well, maintaining coherence and cohesion throughout. However, ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Adding linking phrases or sentences could help improve the natural flow of ideas.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, clearly outlining and summarizing the main points of the essay.
logical structure
The essay presents logically structured arguments, starting with the reasons for the rise in self-employment and moving on to discuss its potential disadvantages.
supported main points
Your main points are well-supported, making the essay persuasive and well-rounded. The discussion of stress alleviation and financial instability is particularly effective.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.