IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that newspapers are the best way to get news. However others believe that other media are better source of news. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some individuals are of the view that other
media
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 are better root for
news
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.
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However
Add a comma
However,
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 some individuals believe that the best way of getting
news
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 through the newspaper. The essay will discuss both
views
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 and
gives
Correct subject-verb agreement
give
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 the writer's opinion.
To begin
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 with,
due to
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 the advancement of technology, the
media
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 are a great source of
news
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 and
informations
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information
pieces of information
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.
Such
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 as radio, television and social
media
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 handles (Facebook, Twitter and others). One can listen to the
news
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 through radio
station
Fix the agreement mistake
stations
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 when driving or working at the same time. There is no need to park or pause whatever you are doing to read papers and it's convenient too. Another point is reading
news
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on
Change preposition
in
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Use synonyms
media
Correct article usage
the media
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 can give you access to other
people
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's opinions and suggestions. Their
views
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 give you a clear understanding of the whole issue.
On the other hand
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, updates from
newspapers
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 lack
readers
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readers'
reader's
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 suggestions and comments.
Due to
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 the lack of space on the
paper's
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papers
paper
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.
People
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's
views
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 are not documented which makes reading boring. Another point is that updates from
newspapers
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 are genuine since the information is revised by the authorities before publishing
them
Correct pronoun usage
it
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.
For instance
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, daily graphics in the Ghana auditor team
read
Add a missing verb
are read
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 and revised for errors and any grammar mistakes before publishing them. Another point is that
newspapers
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 could be kept and serve as a reference for future use.
For instance
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, in 1954 a story about communication was published by the German Times and it's surfacing today as a tool for reference to what the author said. To add up, most
people
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 feel bored when reading from papers because of how huge and the kind of grammar being used.
To conclude
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, getting updates from
newspapers
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 is free from grammatical errors, they serve as a form of reference and have no space for suggestions.
Whereas
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news
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 from the
media
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 is convenient,
people
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's
views
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 are shared.

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task achievement
1. Improve Grammar and Vocabulary: There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. For example, "better root for news" should be "better source of news." Consider revising sentences for clarity and grammatical accuracy.
coherence cohesion
2. Strengthen Introduction and Conclusion: The introduction and conclusion can be more engaging. The conclusion should clearly summarize the key points discussed.
task achievement
3. Provide More Specific Examples: The essay could benefit from more specific examples that further illustrate your points. For instance, mentioning specific news events that were effectively covered by radio or TV.
task achievement
1. Balanced Discussion: Your essay discusses both views thoroughly, providing a balanced analysis of the topic.
coherence cohesion
2. Logical Structure: Your essay follows a logical structure, moving from one point to another coherently.
task achievement
3. Relevant Points: You've raised relevant points to support each side of the argument, which strengthens your analysis.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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