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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people`s coffee and tea buying and drinling habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people`s coffee and tea buying and drinling habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#results #survey #people`s #coffee #tea #habits #five #australian #cities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The visual illustrates the information about the
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
done in five different cities in
Australian
Correct your spelling
Australia
show examples
 about buying and drinking coffee and
tea
Use synonyms
. The results show that the number of
people
Use synonyms
 in every city that went to a cafe
for drinking
Change preposition
to drink
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tea
Use synonyms
 or
caffee
Correct your spelling
coffee
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 four
week
Fix the agreement mistake
weeks
show examples
 was the most
amoung
Correct your spelling
among
 the other habits. The
researchs
Correct your spelling
research
researches
researchers
show
Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
show examples
 that the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who went to a cafe
for drinking
Change preposition
to drink
show examples
tea
Use synonyms
 and
cafe
Fix the agreement mistake
cafes
show examples
 in Australia were the most
papular
Correct your spelling
popular
show examples
 in
coparison
Correct your spelling
comparison
 with
Correct article usage
the
show examples
two other
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
show examples
. In Horbat, Melbourne and Sydney these
people
Use synonyms
 were more than 60
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
also
Linking Words
 these
people
Use synonyms
 in Brisbane were
ecaxtly
Correct your spelling
exactly
 55
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and in Adelaide were approximately around 50
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. The groups of
people
Use synonyms
 who bought instant coffee in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4 weeks in Hobart were the most with around 55
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and in
Brissbane
Correct your spelling
Brisbane
 more than 50
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 which
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 almost the half of
people
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 city and
also
Linking Words
 the Adeline with 50
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 is
almoust
Correct your spelling
almost
 the same;
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 amount in Melbourne is more than 45
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and in Sydney is 45
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. The
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who bought fresh coffee and
tea
Use synonyms
 in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 4 weeks in
Sydneywith
Correct your spelling
Sydney with
 the most amount
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 less than 45
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and more than 40
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in
Mwlbourne
Correct your spelling
Melbourne
. These
people
Use synonyms
 in Hobart were more than 35
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and in Brisbane and Adelaide were
were
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
less than
this
Linking Words
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, last".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words tea, people, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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