The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is believed that
science
is for the sake of human convenience. It should be used as a tool to increase the
quality
of
people
's
lives
.
However
, the development of
science
may not always be compatible with a better
life
for everyone. War and weapons can be a good indication of the devastating
effects
of improvement in
science
. In my opinion,
science
should be only in favour of better
lives
and
such
impacts might be controlled or avoided. First of all, thanks to
science
,
people
's
life
quality
has
appreciated
Verb problem
increased
show examples
substantially. It might be impossible for almost everyone to imagine the world without all
this
progressions
Replace the word
progress
show examples
.
For example
, the development in agricultural equipment and methods has caused a rise in the amount of food production and made the food available for the increasing population of the world. Another example might be the technology. Basically,
people
rely on technology so heavily that a day without it might turn out
tobe
Correct your spelling
to be
show examples
Correct article usage
an anightmare
show examples
anightmare
Correct your spelling
a nightmare
nightmare
. One reason for
that is
the extent to which it made everything easier, we do not have to go to the banks anymore and squander our precious time in crowded rows for opening a bank account or paying a bill. We
also
get to purchase our needed items online in less than a minute. So, the improvement of
science
in agriculture and technology are two great examples of how
science
can lead us to a better and easier
life
.
On the other hand
, the catastrophic
effects
of
science
should not be ignored. It can be a double-edged sword and the impacts may not be compatible with a better
quality
of human
life
. Governments may spend a lot of money on manufacturing new and powerful weapons to extend their territories and put the
lives
of many
poeples
Correct your spelling
peoples
people
at risk. In
this
case not only
the
Add a missing verb
does the
show examples
development of
science
not result in
life
improvement, but
also
it will cause many problems
instead
.
Thus
, I believe that the main purpose of
science
might be to increase the
life
quality
, and
such
devastating
effects
should be eliminated. In conclusion,
Science
can have both negative and positive
effects
on
people
's
lives
, it is important to be aware of the negative ones and try to work toward the ones that lead to a better
life
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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coherence cohesion
To improve the coherence and cohesion of your essay, try to ensure that all parts of your paragraphs are clearly related to the main point. You may want to use more transitional phrases to connect your ideas effectively.
task achievement
Your essay would benefit from more specific and detailed examples. While your examples related to agriculture and technology are good, more depth and specificity would make your arguments stronger.
general
Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and typos such as 'progressions' instead of 'progress,' 'tobe anightmare' instead of 'to be a nightmare,' and 'poeples' instead of 'people.' Correcting these would make your writing clearer.
task achievement
You have effectively covered both sides of the argument, which makes your discussion balanced and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and encapsulate the main points of the essay effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your essay follows a logical structure, with clear paragraphing and development of ideas.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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