In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while other believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #people #salaries #country #government #control #limit #amount

IIt

Correct your spelling

is said that, in some nations, extremely high

salaries

are earned by a few

people

. Some believe

this

can be good for a

country

whereas

others think that

salaries

should be controlled by the

the

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

government and limit the amount

people

can earn. First of all, high

salaries

can lead to the cultivation of a society. One of the best motivations for individuals to promote their work is financial issues, and most of them may have a dream of wealth,

as a result

, they would do their best in their work environments to achieve

this

financial goal.

This

purpose requires more innovations, inventions and even better presentation of services which in turn, leads to the flourishing of a society.

Furthermore

, the ability to

earnextremely

Correct your spelling

earn extremely

high

salaries

in a

country

can attract foreign investors. When business owners witness

people

in a

country

can

Verb problem

apply

show examples

earn extremely high

salaries

due to

their government support and regulations, they may become enthusiastic to invest in

such

country

. It leads to bringing currency to the

country

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and flourishing its economy.

On the other hand

, making extremely high incomes

Change preposition

for

show examples

a few

people

can increase the social gap.

This

can disrupt the idea of human equality.

While

some

people

may have luxurious lives, others may deal with basic human needs

such

as housing.

For example

, in developing countries, like African countries,

such

differences can be seen.

In addition

, the chance of stealing is high in societies in which some

people

make extremely high

salaries

. Individuals may be

temted

Correct your spelling

tempted

tested

Change preposition

show examples

internet fraud to earn more money

instead

of working harder. In conclusion, I believe that

although

earning extremely high

salaries

may have drawbacks, like increasing the chance of stealing or widening the social gap, its significant benefits,

such

as social and economic development, for the

country

are undeniable.

According to

these important advantages, it is not necessary for governments to control and limit

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

salaries

Submitted by hg1984 on Sat Jul 27 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Consider including more relevant and specific examples to better illustrate your arguments. For instance, more concrete examples from recognizable countries or situations can strengthen your points.

coherence cohesion

While the essay generally maintains a clear structure, ensure smoother transitions between paragraphs. This will help maintain the readers' engagement and improve flow.

task achievement

The essay covers both viewpoints and provides a balanced discussion, showing a good understanding of the topic.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are effectively presented, clearly stating the issue and summarizing the arguments made.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

320 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

wealth inequality
economic growth
motivation
talent acquisition
consumer spending
tax revenue
redistributing wealth
market forces
income disparity
social stability
freedom of choice
meritocracy

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is no denying the fact that young society are needed to have full-timefuture learning until
7
band
In recent years, the pressure on schools and university students has been increasing. And they are pushed to work hard at a very young age. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
It is certainly true that in the past couple of years, the stress on school and university students has significantly increased and that they are being pushed to the extreme limits at a young age. I believe this leads to a positive development, which I have discussed below in detail.
6.5
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
In contemporary society, students' opinions of educational institutions have consistently been a topic of interest among the masses. Some individuals champion the notion that part of university students are desperate to learn extra subjects that are not related to their major subjects, while a significant number of others posit that we should make qualification a priority, therefore, the university should provide more free time for students to focus on studying. Although I do acknowledge that both sides have their merits, I lean more toward the latter and I believe it is more crucial to improve the education systems which can benefit students most.
5
band
Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays an increasing number of people are becoming concerned about their health and the quality of their diet. There are two diametrically opposed opinions on the matter. Some people believe that each and every individual is responsible for their own health while others state that it is the government that must ensure that the citizens have healthy eating habits.
6.5
band
n spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?
Although there has been some significant development in the agricultural sector, there are countries that are still suffering from hunger. This essay will primarily discuss that the main reason for this starvation are global warming, civil wars and poverty and these can be alleviated by increasing co-operation and reducing social problems in addition to dumping excess food. The foremost reasons for the rise in hunger are also due to the increase in population along with lowering living standards. Firstly, the increment in the population density is leading to civil wars, the budget is not redirected towards either farming or finding ways to increase production, thus disrupting the continuous supply of food supply. Secondly, underdeveloped countries tend to prioritize manual labour due to a lack of money to purchase automated types of equipment which in turn slows down the rate of food production.For example, farmers in Niger have to carry buckets of water over long distances since t...

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while other believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, the pressure on schools and university students has been increasing. And they are pushed to work hard at a very young age. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

n spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+