It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #money #future

Money

plays a vital role in the modern commercial world.

Therefore

money

-saving has become a fundamental need for everyone, including youngsters. I believe

money

must be saved to achieve financial stability and economic security.

To begin

with, it can't be denied that everything, including education, has become commercialised, where financial stability is necessary to pursue educational and career goals. To maintain economic stability, individuals should have a habit of saving at an early age.

This

habit would prevent them from trapping in debt as adults.

Additionally

, they could accomplish their long-term goals without having financial issues. A survey conducted by AN Indian Newspaper ''The Times'' revealed that in middle-class families, youngsters who start during their college time are more likely to pursue study abroad than others.

Moreover

life

is uncertain for the future. Economic security has become cumbersome in

this

competitive era, where youth can encounter various unforeseen situations in

life

such

as losing a job, physical disability, and family issues. During

this

time, having a safety fund acts as a safeguard and promptly heals the worst circumstances.

Furthermore

, securing emergency funds escapes masses to reliance on credits or high-interest loans. Resultantly, they live

life

under economic security, which provides psychological satisfaction. A recent study revealed that individuals who demonstrate strong

money

management skills tend to report higher levels of

overall

life

satisfaction compared to those who struggle with financial management.

To conclude

although

saving is associated with sacrificing some enjoyment at an early age, it leads to many economic benefits. People should be encouraged to save

money

regardless of their age.

Submitted by parminderbitti3 on Sat Jul 27 2024

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task achievement

It is important to explain and elaborate on how the example given (The Times survey) supports the point of saving money during college time and pursuing study abroad.

coherence cohesion

Try to ensure a smoother transition between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow. For example, you could use phrases like 'In addition' or 'Furthermore' at the beginning of paragraphs to better link ideas.

task achievement

The essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task, addressing the importance of saving money for young people.

task achievement

The essay includes relevant and specific examples, such as the survey by 'The Times.'

coherence cohesion

There is a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the main arguments of the essay.

coherence cohesion

The main points are logically structured and well-supported.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
safety net
unforeseen circumstances
emergencies
future investments
retirement planning
financial discipline
habit of saving
amassing wealth
substantial fund
opportunity cost
additional income
inflation
purchasing power

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