Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays, some people believe that it is not compulsory for parents who send their offspring to private schools to pay
taxes
for educational purposes. Considering all the advantages educational
taxes
bring to our lives, I totally disagree with
this
statement.
Firstly
, paying
taxes
should be required for each person because we need to take
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsibility for our nation.
Secondly
, it is beneficial for all members of a country to have a better educational system, which creates a professional workforce and improves the
overall
economy. To exemplify, education
taxes
help maintain the public school system, ensuring learning opportunities for children of all classes, and making sure that the label workforce of that country can meet the advanced technological requirements in the future. Looking at the solutions for
this
controversial topic, readjustment or
taxes
Fix the agreement mistake
tax
show examples
reducing
Replace the word
reduction
show examples
might not be the good answer. First of all, perfect equality should never exist, if rich parents, who are able to pay for higher tuition fees at private schools, have a discount, it means that poorer families have to pay the higher rates. The second reason is that we all have to pay
additional
Add an article
an additional
the additional
show examples
contribution
Fix the agreement mistake
contributions
show examples
for the services we use, why educational
taxes
are exceptions? To end my essay, I want to emphasize the profound impacts of education on our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
and that people should pay an equal amount of
taxes
for
this
purpose to create future sustainable development.
Submitted by anhduong.mth0102 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
In your essay, I noticed a few grammatical errors and a lack of smooth transitions between ideas. Improving sentence structures and using linking words more effectively can enhance the coherence and cohesion of the essay.
task achievement
Strengthen the main points with more relevant and specific examples. This would make your arguments more convincing and show a deeper engagement with the topic.
coherence cohesion
While your essay has an introduction and conclusion, consider providing a more detailed overview in the introduction and expanding the conclusion with a summary of the key points discussed.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position on the topic, reflecting your stance that parents who send their children to private schools should still pay education taxes.
coherence cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical, with separate paragraphs for different arguments. This helps the reader follow your train of thought.
task achievement
You have effectively identified multiple reasons supporting your viewpoint, such as the benefits of a strong public education system and the fairness of tax distribution.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • tax exemption
  • public education
  • private schools
  • collective responsibility
  • societal welfare
  • equitable access
  • financial burden
  • social cohesion
  • tax credits
  • vouchers
  • subsidies
  • state-funded
  • socioeconomic disparities
  • public vs. private sector
  • quality of education
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!