Some suggest than young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the itadvantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this.
Nowadays, starting an occupation
on
the Change preposition
at
accurate
Correct word choice
appropriate
time
is one of the most significant issues among the youth; there is a group who opines that mature students ought to have a temporary job during their education period in schools and colleges. Taking such
action
will bear some drawbacks and positive points
, all of which will be discussed in the following paragraphs.
Pupils can benefit from working and studding
at the same Correct your spelling
studying
time
; they will be made skilled one
for their future jobs. Correct pronoun usage
ones
For instance
, when one tries to utilize effectively their free time
by occupying in
a particular career, they will learn novel skills Change preposition
apply
along
their study subjects; Change preposition
in
this
issue will assist them to become more expert ones
in comparison to their counterparts who just spend their Correct pronoun usage
apply
time
for
Change preposition
apply
studding
. Correct your spelling
studying
Additionally
, they will be offered more job positions with high incomes, when they want to embark on a permanent career after their graduations
. Fix the agreement mistake
graduation
Furthermore
, the opportunity for climbing to the
specific career will be more accessible for Correct article usage
a
people
who start to work in their teens rather than ones who do not.
Taking such
action
, in contrast
, can bear some disadvantageous points
for people
, the drawbacks which can irreparably affect their lives. Losing advanced study positions, being unconscious on
lessons and not having sufficient Change preposition
of
time
for resting can be count
as Change the verb form
be counted
this
action
's negative points
. For example
, if individuals making
an attempt to earn money in their free Wrong verb form
make
time
, they will not only be able spend
adequate Add the particle
to spend
time
for
conducting professional Change preposition
apply
researches
and learning accurately, but Fix the agreement mistake
research
also
they will not be successful to achieve
proper Change preposition
in achieving
points
in their lectures, the action
which can deprive them from having higher educations. Besides
, working during educational years can have detrimental effects on people
's physical and psychological health due to
not having enough time
for resting and some entertainments
.
In conclusion, there is a perspective which expresses that young Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
people
should work even for a short time
within their educational period. This
issue has some advantages such
as become
a skilled person for their future lives, Wrong verb form
becoming
while
it can bear some negative points
like losing the
position Correct article usage
a
of
higher education.Change preposition
in
Submitted by shaghayegh95shadman on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Make sure to proofread for minor grammatical and typographical errors, such as 'advantages' instead of 'itadvantages' and 'studding' instead of 'studying'.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to maintain a logical flow throughout the essay. Some ideas in your essay feel a bit disconnected.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly sets up the essay and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.
complete response
The essay addresses the task comprehensively, discussing both advantages and disadvantages of working between school and university.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!