Today parents spend less free time with their children. Who are more affected?

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The lack of family quality time has a more significant impact on children than their parents. Minors rely on their parents for emotional support, guidance, and role-modelling, and mothers and fathers play a crucial role in developing their children’s self-esteem and a sense of belonging. Unlike juveniles, adults are more equipped to handle stress, disconnection and guilt for not accompanying their loved ones.

However

, these emotions can cause a child to feel neglected, confused, and hurt, which could to a host of negative outcomes

such

as poor academic performance, behavioural problems, and mental health issues.

While

both parents and children may be affected by devoting less time together, the latter category is more vulnerable.

Submitted by banhbao0565 on Sun Jul 28 2024

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coherence cohesion

A more clearly defined paragraph structure would enhance readability and the logical flow of your essay. Consider separating the ideas into distinct paragraphs with clear transitions.

task achievement

While your ideas are clear and comprehensive, adding specific examples or evidence to support your points would strengthen your argument. This would make your essay more compelling and better demonstrate your understanding of the topic.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear and relevant response to the task, focusing on the impact of parents spending less free time with their children.

coherence cohesion

You have articulated your ideas in a coherent manner, ensuring that your points are logically developed and connected.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

114 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Parental involvement
Work-life balance
Screen time
Societal norms
Neglect
Guilt
Milestones
Family bonding
Quality time
Effective parenting
Familial connections
Dedicated family time

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Today parents spend less free time with their children. Who are more affected?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many doctors say that people in today’s world do not do enough physical exercise. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions are there to this problem?

It is better to learn the way people lived in past through films and videos records than written documents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that it is necessary to test new medicines on animals, while other people feel that this is not fair on animals and not necessary. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Many people today are worried about cyber crime such as hacking and identity theft. What problems does cyber crime cause andd what solutions can you suggest for ordinary people and business to take?

Describe a time when you talked to a group of people.