Over time, as children grow older, the relationship they have with their parents changes. In your opinion, what role should parents have in their adult children’s lives? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
Relationships
show examples
between
children
and
parents
will not be the same, it will change
overtime
Correct your spelling
over time
show examples
depend
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depending
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on the stage their
kids
through. In my opinion,
parents
should
transfrom
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transition
from primary being
caregiver
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caregivers
show examples
to supportive mentors in their
adults
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adult
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lives.
This
role
involve
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involves
show examples
offering guidance, emotional support and
respecting
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respect
show examples
. The approach will
beneficial
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be beneficial
show examples
for
parents
to have a good
relationship
with their
kids
.
Firstly
, as an
adult
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adult,
show examples
they will face new challenges and responsibilities in their life. As
parents
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parents,
show examples
you should be there as a mentor.
For example
, when I had my first job, my
parents
gave
insight
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me insight
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about
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into
show examples
workplace
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the workplace
show examples
and
carrier
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career
show examples
advice. Their support was valuable
form
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from
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me.
Moreover
, emotional support is important for adulthood. The complexities of life,
such
as pressure at work, romantic
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
, and friendship can be overwhelming. Having
strong
Add an article
a strong
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emotional bond with the
children
will help them through their difficult times. Your present will make them feel secure and
comfort
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comfortable
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.
Lastly
, respect
foster
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fosters
show examples
healthy
relationship
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relationships
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both
parents
and
kids
.
This
is
essential
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an essential
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aspect
in
Change preposition
of
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parental
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a parental
the parental
show examples
role.
Parents
should respect with
children
's choices.
For instance
, when I decided
my
Change preposition
on my
show examples
first job. My
parents
wanted me to work in
law
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a law
the law
show examples
firm and be a lawyer. But, I have
other dream job
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another dream job
other dream jobs
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, I want to work in
international
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the international
an international
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organization
who
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that
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focus
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focuses
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on human
right
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rights
show examples
. After
long
Add an article
a long
show examples
discussion, my
parents
allowed and supported my choice. In conclusion, as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
grow up,
parental
Add an article
the parental
show examples
role
Fix the agreement mistake
roles
show examples
should evolve. To create a healthy
relationship
and a strong connection
parents
should act like a mentor, being supportive and
rescpect
Correct your spelling
respect
. By adapting these approaches I believe healthy
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
both
parents
and
kids
can be achieved.
Submitted by desimardianti0590 on

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coherence cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of your essay by linking your paragraphs better and using more transitional phrases.
task achievement
Work on your grammar and sentence structure to make your writing clearer and more fluent. This will also help with achieving a higher score in clarity and comprehensiveness.
task achievement
Include more relevant and specific examples to support your main points. Detailed examples can make your arguments stronger.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a smoother introduction to capture the reader's interest and a more structured conclusion that decisively wraps up your argument.
task achievement
You present clear and comprehensive ideas regarding the evolving role of parents in their adult children's lives.
task achievement
Your essay provides valuable insights into mentorship, emotional support, and respect, which are crucial in parent-child relationships.
coherence cohesion
You effectively introduce and conclude your essay, ensuring the reader understands your main points.

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