Healthcare costs are increasing, and may governments are finding it difficult to balance their healthcare budget. Should citizens be responsible for their health with private health insurance, or should the government provide free healthcare for all.

These days, many
society
Change to a plural noun
societies
show examples
have complained about the high cost of
healthcare
services, with prices increasing dramatically.
However
, governments are struggling to afford it.
Therefore
,
citizens
are forced to pay for their procedures out of pocket. Is
this
fair? I truly support that health is an essential requirement and governments need to provide financial support to all
citizens
. On one side of the argument, people are responsible for their
healthcare
services individually with private health insurance. One of the major reasons for
that is
numerous countries do have not enough budget or economic resources to afford it. Particularly,
while
roughly 70 countries in Africa are not able to provide food to poor
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
show examples
, they have no chance to increase the medical budget.
On the other hand
, many countries aid in surgeries and basic medical care
such
as fewer, stomach, or eye illnesses. Meanwhile, public hospitals give opportunities for surgery operations in emergency situations
such
as urgent transplantation or bone breaks.
Moreover
, in many nations, governments supply ambulances to patients free.
However
,
while
various regions aid in critical surgeries or basic medical diseases,
citizens
afford to substantial number of
healthcare
treatments, drugs, surgeries, or medical equipment.
For instance
, in the USA, if
citizens
call an ambulance and see a doctor for a high temperature or fewer with no private insurance, they have to spend more than thousands of dollars.
Furthermore
, whilst juveniles are close to dying because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
SMA (Spiral Muscular Atrophy), the Turkish Government do not have a policy to support
this
surgery. If authorities desire to live in a peaceful and happy country, they need to provide free
healthcare
services to
crowd
Correct article usage
the crowd
show examples
equally. Health is a fundamental requirement of
citizens
and
this
is an undeniable truth. In conclusion,
while
some
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
believe that individuals should pay money to private insurance, there are more effective solutions that the ministry could implement. By cutting the cost of essential treatments for vulnerable groups and providing free medicine, the government can ensure fair access to
healthcare
. These measures would help create a more equitable system and economic concerns all around the world.
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task achievement
The essay addresses the task but can be developed further. Be sure to cover both arguments more equally and delve deeper into their implications.
task achievement
Ensure that each supporting idea is fully developed. For instance, you could provide more detailed examples or statistics to illustrate your points more comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical flow by ensuring that each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Transition words and phrases can enhance the connectivity between your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Good job in including both an introduction and conclusion. However, consider making your conclusion more memorable by summarizing the key points and stating your final stance clearly.
task achievement
Well-done on clearly stating your position in the introduction. This sets a clear direction for your essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay effectively includes an introduction and conclusion, giving it a complete structure.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health outcomes
  • equality
  • financial status
  • quality care
  • competition
  • service delivery
  • economies of scale
  • regulate
  • control prices
  • vulnerable populations
  • moral obligation
  • personalized and flexible plans
  • burden on government resources
  • waiting times
  • budget constraints
  • preventive measures
  • health education
  • chronic diseases
  • health is a public good
  • access to healthcare
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