IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In many places, new homes are needed but the only space available for building them is in the country side. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this

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Urbanization helps every country's economy to rise. For
this
Linking Words
 matter, new places must be vacated with new
homes
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as those in the countryside.
However
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, some
argues
Change the verb form
argue
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 that leaving the countryside free from urban
homes
Use synonyms
 saves the environment.
Due to
Linking Words
 the economy, it is likely for the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 to keep it on a higher level.
This
Linking Words
 will lead them to eagerly build more projects including commercial buildings, factories and massive areas for divisioned
homes
Use synonyms
. A governor in the Philippines named Manny Villar is a politician and at the same time a businessman. He is more mindful
in
Change preposition
of
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 the country's income rate neglecting and ignoring the harmful effects
to
Change preposition
on
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 the environment.
This
Linking Words
 will constantly contribute
and
Change preposition
to and
show examples
 possibly alleviate the climate problem that
people
Use synonyms
 are facing now. Apart from that, some
people
Use synonyms
 think that
this
Linking Words
 plan will more likely
serves
Change the verb form
serve
show examples
 as a tool
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a progressive and
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
developing country. In
this
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 regard,
this
Linking Words
 change might raise
people
Use synonyms
 from poverty. Politicians will
enticely
Correct your spelling
entirely
entice
 convince
people
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
poor areas to allow government
build
Fix the infinitive
to build
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
homes
Use synonyms
 and demolish their houses.
Hence
Linking Words
, the money gained from houses will be shared partly from the income.
To conclude
Linking Words
, these projects will destroy the environment.
However
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
 provides
people
Use synonyms
 a way to
better
Add an article
a better
the better
show examples
 and
easy
Replace the word
easier
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 life. The government will get the benefits
as well as
Linking Words
 the
people
Use synonyms
 regardless
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 how
this
Linking Words
 affects the climate.

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task achievement
While the essay addresses the core issues, the argumentation could be more developed. Try to add more specific examples and elaborate further on your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your paragraphs are more cohesive. Use transitional phrases to improve flow and make the essay easier to follow.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly sets up the essay's main debate about urban development vs. environmental protection.
task achievement
You have included relevant examples, such as mentioning Manny Villar, to support your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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