Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from TV as well as from international sporting competitions. To what extent do you agree?

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The role of combat

sports

Use synonyms

on mental and physical health has been a major topic of concern in today's society. From my perspective, martial arts are infeasible for both sides and there are compelling reasons why

such

Linking Words

sports

Use synonyms

should be forbidden rather than organising

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

international competitions. On the one hand, there is no doubt that combat business

are

Change the verb form

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more popular among teenagers in comparison to other

sports

Use synonyms

such

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as swimming,

athletics

Correct word choice

and athletics

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. One explanation for

this

Linking Words

is that martial arts offer bodily activeness accompanied by vogue in their climate and protection from peer bullying.

In addition

Linking Words

, combat

sports

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programmes have

a high ratings

Correct the article-noun agreement

high ratings

a high rating

show examples

and they are represented as the main way to take the lead by numerous famous sponsors.

As a result

Linking Words

such

Linking Words

sports

Use synonyms

involving violence become a more attractive path

Change preposition

show examples

career

Add an article

a career

the career

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which

provide

Correct subject-verb agreement

provides

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health, popularity and high income at the same time.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the damages of martial arts are much more than their benefits in terms of physical health.

For instance

Linking Words

, famous box player Muhammed Ali suffered from

Alzheimer

Change noun form

Alzheimer's

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until his death and the leading reason for

this

Linking Words

disease was the blows he received in the ring.

Moreover

Linking Words

, young who have a physical advantage

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

tend usually to solve any problem with brute force,

therefore

Linking Words

their tolerance for different points of view and discussion decreases.

This

Linking Words

results in the increase of unethical behaviour in society and within the family. In conclusion,

Change the capitalization

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admit that everyone should have bodily fitness for self-defending in unexpected situations, albeit

Change the capitalization

show examples

believe that

sports

Use synonyms

involving violence impact detrimentally on both physical and moral aspects,

thus

Linking Words

, they should be banned as a professional

sports

Use synonyms

branch.

i.nureddinnMon Jul 29 2024

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task achievement

To enhance your task response, make sure to provide a more balanced discussion by considering potential counterarguments. A more thorough exploration of the viewpoints against banning violent sports could strengthen your essay.

coherence cohesion

Your essay would benefit from clearer transitions between paragraphs. Consider using more cohesive devices (e.g., 'Moreover', 'However', 'Furthermore') to better connect your ideas and improve flow.

coherence cohesion

Work on improving the logical structure by elaborating on your key points with more detail and examples. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea that is well-explained and supported.

task achievement

Your introduction clearly states your perspective on the issue, which sets the stage for your argument.

task achievement

The essay contains relevant examples to support your points, such as the mention of Muhammad Ali. This adds depth to your argument.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion, which gives a sense of closure to your essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

combat sports
glorification of violence
impressionable audiences
cultural heritage
self-discipline
sportsmanship
media portrayal
regulatory measures
censorship
psychological impact
broadcasting regulations
watershed timing
advocates and opponents
ethical considerations
economic implications

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Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from TV as well as from international sporting competitions. To what extent do you agree?

Team activities can teach more skills for life than those activities, which are played alone. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The governments should give each citizen a basic income so that they have enough money to live on, even if they are unemployed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced number of time people spend seeing their friends. This has had a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Imagine you are a compliance professional charged with ensuring that a doctor’s office is HIPAA-compliant. 1. How would you go about accomplishing that goal? 2. Who would you consult in making a plan? 3. What policies and procedures would you institute?