More and more children are accessing the Internet unsupervised. This can sometimes put them at risk. What problems do you think parents face when dealing with their children using the Internet? How can this problem be solved?

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In recent times,
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of children are now able to
use
the internet without any sort of
guide
Replace the word
guidance
show examples
from their
parents
, putting them in danger. Guardians now find
time
their
time
management lacking as they try and deal with
this
issue.
However
, they can set
time
limits on these gadgets that have access to the web and
also
learn more on how to
ristrict
Correct your spelling
restrict
explicit sites. The main problem that has
arose
Wrong verb form
arisen
show examples
amognst
Correct your spelling
among
parents
when dealing with
this
issue is
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time
management.
Care givers
Correct your spelling
Caregivers
show examples
now spend
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of
time
watching over those younger ones that have
acces
Correct your spelling
access
to the web so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
visit toxic websites that can provide explicit content to the child. By so doing, they fail to do all that they would have planned to do
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
while
making sure the minor does not fall into danger.
For example
, there are adverts that encourage things like betting which is addictive and can cause huge losses in life. Spending
time
guiding the children from
such
sites and adverts
cost
Correct subject-verb agreement
costs
show examples
much
time
which could be used for
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
productive work. To handle
this
problem, there is
need
Correct article usage
a need
show examples
to set
time
and data
limit
Fix the agreement mistake
limits
show examples
on the gadgets that
gives
Change the verb form
give
show examples
them internet access. With the advanced technology, one can now set the amount of data a certain gadget can
use
in
given
Correct article usage
a given
show examples
time
leading to a solution that will cut off
time
spent on
moble
Correct your spelling
mobile
show examples
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
and computers.
Parents
can
as well
Rephrase
also
show examples
draw up a timetable for the
use
of computers and
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
, coming up with a schedule for games and homework as well, In conclusion,
parents
are struggling to keep up with their
time
as planned because much of the
time
is being spent on monitoring children. But, there are solutions to these problems that include setting
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
data limits and a timetable
to
Change preposition
for to
show examples
use
smartphones
Change preposition
of smartphones
show examples
and laptops.
Submitted by sisalt100 on

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grammar vocabulary
Try to reduce minor grammatical errors and typos like 'alot' instead of 'a lot', 'arose' instead of 'arisen', etc. These can make the text look less polished.
task response
Expand on your examples to make them more specific and more directly tied to your points. This can strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
grammar vocabulary
Aim for more diverse language in your synonyms and expressions to showcase a broader vocabulary range. For instance, the repetitive use of phrases like 'time management' could be diversified to avoid redundancy.
task response
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt clearly, identifying problems parents face and suggesting solutions.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly present and they frame the essay well, contributing to a coherent structure.
coherence cohesion
Your overall ideas are clear and logical, following a coherent line of thought throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • inappropriate content
  • cyberbullying
  • mental health
  • emotional and psychological damage
  • online predators
  • safety risks
  • excessive screen time
  • sleep deprivation
  • academic performance
  • social isolation
  • parental control software
  • digital literacy
  • screen time limits
  • open communication
  • monitoring online activities
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