The graph below shows the changes in maximum number of Asian elephants between 1994 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#changes #asian #elephants #information #features #comparisons

These bar charts

shows

Change the verb form

show

show examples

the

population

of Asian

elephant

Fix the agreement mistake

elephants

show examples

in the year 1994 to 2007. It

clear

Add a missing verb

is clear

show examples

that

indian's

Correct your spelling

Indian

elephants have the highest

rate

while

china's

Capitalize word

China's

show examples

elephants have the lowest

rate

According to

what

shown

Add a missing verb

is shown

show examples

, we can see that in 1994 Vietnam ,Malaysia ,Laos and Thailand

have

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

smilar

Correct your spelling

similar

number range around 1000-1500 .

While

china

Capitalize word

China

show examples

has

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

the lowest number in 1994 about 500.

On the other hand

,the highest elephant

population

is in

india

Change the capitalization

India

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

7500. The

secound

Correct your spelling

second

highest

rate

goes to

Mayanmar

Correct your spelling

Myanmar

by about 4700 .

Furthermore

SriLanka

Correct your spelling

Sri Lanka

show examples

has

number

Correct article usage

a number

show examples

close to 2700 . In comparison with 2004,

india

Change the capitalization

India

show examples

have the

upper

Correct word choice

highest

show examples

population

ever near to 10000.

contrast

Add a comma

contrast,

show examples

china has only 1000.

Moreover

, Vietnam , Cambodia and Laos have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

related numbers close to 1000-1200.

As well as

Malaysia and

SriLanka

Correct your spelling

Sri Lanka

show examples

have a similar

rate

near to 3000.

In addition

Mayanmar

Correct word choice

the Mayan

show examples

population

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

rise

Replace the word

rose

show examples

to 5300 and Thailand

growth

Replace the word

grew

show examples

to 3800.

To sum up

, we

cloud

Verb problem

can

show examples

say that Cambodia is the only country that has

Add a missing verb

had a

show examples

drop

since

Change preposition

show examples

the years .

While

all other countries have

Change the article

show examples

increasing with

diffrence

Correct your spelling

different

numbers.

Submitted by weed92xx on Mon Jul 29 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words population, rate with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

188 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

fluctuate
peak
trend
decline
increase
decrease
population
significant
dramatic
stability
data
estimate
notable
comparative
contrast
approximately
maximum
over the period

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The graph below shows the changes in maximum number of Asian elephants between 1994 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in.

Some people say that success is "10 percent talent and 90 percent hard work". Is hard work the key to success, or is talent also important

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people.

You want to join a local club or organization. Write a letter to the club secretary. In your letter: - Introduce yourself and explain why you are interested. - Ask about membership requirements. - Enquire about the next meeting or event.

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it should be stopped. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.