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Writing Samples
Band 7

The diagram below shows how instant noodles are manufactured.

The diagram below shows how instant noodles are manufactured.
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The diagram depicts the process of manufacturing instant
noodles
Use synonyms
 with 8
steps
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the flour of storage siles is sent to a factory by cous. After arriving at the factory, flour is mixed with water and oil, and delivered by the rollers to become the dough sheets.
Next,
Linking Words
the sheets are divided into strips and
then
Linking Words
 sequenced into a circle.
Subsequently
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, the noodle discs are cooked with oil and drought.
Then
Linking Words
, they are put into cups with some vegetables and spices. After these
steps
Use synonyms
, the cups of
noodles
Use synonyms
 are labelled and sealed, ultimately being sent to sell.
Overall
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 manufactory has a specific flour process and can be divided into three
steps
Use synonyms
, namely delivering, shaping, and packing.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the flout is sent to the factory, steered with water and oil, and becomes a mixer.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the mixer is shaped by
steps
Use synonyms
 3 to 5, thereby becoming
noodles
Use synonyms
. Eventually,
noodles
Use synonyms
 are put into cups with labels and sent out.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words noodles, steps with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "divided" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • manufacturing process
  • mixing ingredients
  • dough preparation
  • sheeting
  • steaming
  • cutting techniques
  • dehydration
  • deep-frying
  • cooling system
  • packaging
  • quality control
  • production line
  • mass production
  • food preservation
  • convenience food
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