The chart below shows the number of international applicants to the universities of one European country. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The chart below shows the number of international applicants to the universities of one European country. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
The provided bar chart depicts the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of global
applicants
from 4 countries (
USA
,
China
,
Russia
and
Japan
) to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one European country's
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
show examples
throughout
Change preposition
from
show examples
2004 to 2008.
Overall
,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
and
Japan
increased their number of
applicants
in general.
China
's
applicants
diminished between these years
while
Russia
had some fluctuations. In 2004,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most
applicants
were from
China
with more than 25.000
while
other 3
country's
Change noun form
countries
show examples
the total number of
applicants
was lower than approximately 23.000. In 2005,
China
and
Russia
decreased,
China
to around 22.000 and
Russia
diminished to approximately 1.000.
However
,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
increased
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of
applicants
to 15.000
while
Japan
stay
Wrong verb form
stayed
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
as
last
year
like
Change preposition
at
show examples
7.000. In 2006,
China
and
USA
had the same amount of
applicants
with around 17.000.
Japan
slightly increased to 7.000.
Russia
stayed constant. In 2007,
Correct article usage
the Usa
show examples
Usa
Correct your spelling
USA
took the lead from
China
with more than 20.000 after
China
which stayed same as same as
Russia
.
Also
,
Japan
continued to their
slight
Correct article usage
a slight
show examples
increase too. In 2008,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
enhanced
Verb problem
increased
show examples
to more than 25.000
applicants
.
Japan
and
Russia
rose gradually in 2008.
Russia
increased to approximately 3.000
while
Japan
rose to 10.000.
Nevertheless
,
China
declined in 2008 to 15.000.
Submitted by taylanpolat6124 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words applicants, usa, china, russia, japan with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: