Many children today spend a lot of time on social media which hurts their grades. what is the cause of this? What can be done to solve this?

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In the

morden

Correct your spelling

modern

epoch,

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apply

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plenty of

children

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surfing

Wrong verb form

surfed

show examples

diggital

Correct your spelling

digital

platform

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platforms

show examples

almost every minute. There is no doubt that

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apply

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social media is harmful to those youngster's grades, mental health and responsibility. Some of the major culprits of

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

problems will be discussed before the most important solutions are drawn. The factors behind

are

Correct pronoun usage

this are

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digital products' wild use, no

limit

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limits

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and feeling bored . Ways to solve

are

Correct pronoun usage

this are

show examples

purchased

Wrong verb form

purchasing

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electronic products cautiously,

parents

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control and

try

Wrong verb form

trying

show examples

to live in

Correct article usage

the

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real world. Reasons for

this

Linking Words

alarming situation vary. In some cases, more and more teenagers get their first smartphone and iPad too soon. Apparently, they do not have the ability of self-control.

Moreover

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, If kids concentrate on social media

platform

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platforms

show examples

such

Linking Words

as TikTok,

Youtube

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YouTube

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and Instagram,

then

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who will be responsible for their homework, study and

grow

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growth

show examples

Change the punctuation

show examples

Next,

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mother

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mother's

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key reason for

this

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is no clear restrictions.

In other words

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, no one

teach

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teaches

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the

children

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how many hours should they spend on social

network

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networks

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and what actions are not allowed.

Parents

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are the first

teacher

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teachers

show examples

of their kids.

However

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, some

parents

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do not know the importance of it.

Last

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and the most, The reason why young people spend hours on

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

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is because of boring.

For instance

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, not only the

children

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

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but

also

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the

grow-ups

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grown-ups

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click and slide on their phones

everyday

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every day

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. It

cause

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causes

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no one

reach

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to reach

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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true life. Clearly, it is boring for

youngster

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youngsters

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to live a

sincerely

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sincere

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life but no one survives. A number of definitions could be taken to mitigate the problem. The first obvious solution is to purchase digital products carefully.

Following

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this

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parents

Use synonyms

too can play a part. Kids usually have less self-control ability, so

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

they should not use the network without any rules.

Finally

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, Adults need to show their spirits as role models. It is not only

the

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show examples

teenager issue.

To conclude

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, there

are

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show examples

a massive process need

children

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and adults

Add a missing verb

have to

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working

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work

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on. Various solutions exist to mitigate

such

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drawbacks,

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nevertheless

Add a comma

nevertheless,

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an infinite solution has yet to be found.

zerdeteacher2024Wed Jul 31 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on logical structure by organizing your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea. This can help convey your message more effectively.

task achievement

Use specific examples to support your arguments. This can make your points more convincing and relatable.

task achievement

Pay attention to providing a clear thesis statement and conclusion. This helps in framing your essay correctly.

coherence cohesion

Be cautious with grammar and vocabulary, particularly the use of articles and plurals. Small errors can impact readability.

task achievement

The essay addresses the topic and answers the question, covering various causes and potential solutions.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are both present, which provides a sense of completeness to the essay.

task achievement

There are relevant points made about the role of digital products and the influence of parents.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

339 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Addictive design
Infinite scrolling
Personalized content feeds
Peer pressure
Social validation
Fear of missing out (FOMO)
Parental supervision
Digital literacy programs
Extracurricular activities
Awareness campaigns
Conscious regulation
Academic impact
Engagement
Social media usage
Online presence

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Many children today spend a lot of time on social media which hurts their grades. what is the cause of this? What can be done to solve this?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think women should be allowed to join the army, the navy and the air force just like men. To what extent do you agree ordisagree?

Some people believe that technology has made our lives more complicated and the solution is to live a simple life without technology. Agree or disagree?

Some people think teachers have a greater influence than parents on the development of a child's intelligence and social skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinión.

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with others people and get new events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?