there are some people who argue that a person’s value will be judged based on social status and material possessions, while others think that it is better if we consider a person according to values such as honor, kindness and trust
In
this
day and age, there are some people
who argue that a person
’s value will be judged based on social status
and material possessions, while
others think that it is better if we consider a person
according to
values such
as honor
, kindness and trust. To clarify Change the spelling
honour
this
issue, I will present my opinion about both the above views in the next paragraphs.
To begin
with, we will discuss the view that a person
’s value will be judged based on social status
and material possessions. There are some reasons which cause people
to judge another person
through social status
. First of all, some people
with this
mindset may think that a person
who has a good and balanced occupation will also
have a good and high education because when we meet an individual that we have never met before, humans will tend to judge them according to
social status
. For example
, parents often judge high
Correct word choice
apply
people
who have occupations like teacher
or Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
doctor
.
Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
On the other hand
, others believe that values such
as honor
, kindness and trust are important. Change the spelling
honour
Firstly
, I believe that an individual is considered a good person
when they are taught and have wonderful dignity because there are some people
who have a good job but are not a fine person
, they are still able to do some bad activities such
as cheating or stealing. In addition
, people
who have a lot of high-quality dignity will make sure to be respected more by other people
and companies in society. Therefore
, old-fashioned will be more vital in each individual.
In conclusion, in my point of view, I believe that people
who have old-fashioned values such
as honor
, kindness and trust will be considered higher than Change the spelling
honour
people
with a good social status
and material possessions because it is the nature of a person
.Submitted by document.hanie on
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task response
To improve task response, ensure that each paragraph clearly addresses the topic and ties back to the main thesis. Adding more specific examples could help in strengthening your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, consider using more transitional phrases and connectors to make the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs smoother.
coherence and cohesion
Incorporate a stronger conclusion that not only restates your opinion but also reinforces the arguments made throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding the writer's standpoint.
task response
The arguments are relevant to the topic and well-structured, making it easier for the reader to follow the writer's line of reasoning.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?