Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to guarantee a good job, others believe that it would be byeee to go straight into work and get experience instead. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #university #guarantee #job #byeee #work

Securing a job is the paramount goal for every student. Some of them are able to achieve

while

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

others struggle for it. There is an ongoing debate

between

Change preposition

about

show examples

the option

avaible

Correct your spelling

available

for an

invidual

Correct your spelling

individual

either to opt for higher studies for better career

opportunies

Correct your spelling

opportunities

getting

Wrong verb form

get

show examples

practical

knowlege

Correct your spelling

knowledge

instead

. I believe it's not just a degree or university qualification but

also

depend

Correct subject-verb agreement

depends

show examples

on practical

knowledge

. on the one hand,

a higher studies

Correct the article-noun agreement

higher studies

a higher study

show examples

could be crucial to get a good job, but

guranteeing

Correct your spelling

guaranteeing

a sophisticated career would not be appropriate to claim. Because school courses are more of

theoratical

Correct your spelling

theoretical

knowledge

with a little combination of practical awareness like internships, which will not be enough for an individual to get

Change preposition

show examples

the top and secure a job.

Whereas

on the other hand

, indulging in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

practical

practicies

Correct your spelling

practices

will allow

pupil

Add an article

a pupil

the pupil

show examples

to gain experience in

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

certain fields and help them to achieve their dream jobs.

For instance

, a hospital will not risk its reputation to hire a surgeon with no practical skills, which can affect the image of a hospital in public,

while

the same hospital will prefer to hire a surgeon with 2 to 3 years of experience because they can understand that he can perform better in surgeries with the help of his practical

knowledge

. In conclusion, I believe that not just a college or a university degree can guarantee a post because it is based on theoretical

knowledge

Although

theoretical

knowledge

is mandatory too, but, practical

knowledge

is preferable in nowadays world.

Submitted by gpreetmehanger on Thu Aug 01 2024

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grammar

Check for spelling and grammatical errors such as 'avaible' (should be 'available') and 'theoratical' (should be 'theoretical').

introduction

Improve the clarity in the introduction by clearly stating your opinion and the structure of the essay.

examples

Expand the supporting points with more specific examples and deeper analysis.

cohesion

Enhance transitions between paragraphs to improve the flow of ideas.

task response

The essay discusses both sides of the argument, which is essential for this type of task.

conclusion

Good attempt at providing an opinion and a conclusion that summarizes the main points discussed.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

6.5

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

specialized knowledge
positions of responsibility
career growth
academic achievements
dedication
discipline
practical skills
industry
financial independence
on-the-job training
networking
theoretical knowledge
higher education
career advancement

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Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to guarantee a good job, others believe that it would be byeee to go straight into work and get experience instead. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Teenagers nowadays spend too much time on playing video games. Describe the effects on teenagers, families and society. Report the measures to solve the problem.

As more and more information is available online, the role of textbooks has become obsolete. Therefore, universities should replace traditional books with digital materials. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Environmental problems such as pollution and climate variations are increasing nowadays. The governments have taken some measures at a global level. But they got only few solutions. Why is it so? How can this be fixed?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.