The television is good for you. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of watching television. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your experience.

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People have different views about the benefits and drawbacks of watching

While

there are some drawbacks to watching television, I believe that watching shows usually has more positive effects. On the one hand, there are several reasons why I would agree with viewing broadcasts.

Firstly

can help us gain various knowledge and enhance our awareness in different zones,

for example

, some channels may teach about academic studies which can help us deepen our understanding of the world.

Secondly

, it allows us to stop surfing online through our phones, which

has large screens can have a family sit together and chat with each other.

Finally

, watching

also

helps us to relax and calm down,

for instance

, watching some drama or reality shows can release stress and stop thinking about work and studies.

On the other hand

, there are several factors that may have negative impacts on us.

Firstly

, it may cause some health issues

such

as obesity and eye strain, because sitting on the couch for a long

time

and staring at

will lead to less exercise and increased weight. Another key factor is that there are a lot of adverts on all the channels and content that promote negative stereotypes or unrealistic expectations of the public.

In addition

this

, people watching too much

can lead to poor

time

management, reducing productivity, efficiency and

time

for important tasks. In a nutshell, watching television can be a way for families to spend quality

time

together and provide a wide range of news to the world.

Therefore

, I would argue that the advantages of watching television

Verb problem

apply

show examples

outweigh the disadvantages. After people spend more

time

instead

of cell

phone

Fix the agreement mistake

phones

show examples

, they can have more positive effects and become more unruffled.

Submitted by 57025371 on Thu Aug 01 2024

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task achievement

Include more specific examples or case studies to strengthen your arguments. For example, refer to a specific educational channel or a particular type of programming that aids relaxation.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical structure by ensuring each paragraph smoothly transitions into the next. Using linking words like 'furthermore,' 'moreover,' and 'nevertheless' can help improve cohesion.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the discussion well.

task achievement

You provided balanced arguments, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages comprehensively.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

informed
awareness
educational programs
skills
entertainment
relaxation
prolonged
sedentary lifestyle
obesity
eye strain
mental well-being
violent content
productivity
stereotypes
unrealistic expectations

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The television is good for you. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage of watching television. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your experience.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?

“Modern forms of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their friends. This has a negative effect on their social lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?”

Some people think painting and drawings are important as other subjects. They should be compulsory in high school education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that it is beneficial for children to play games online, while others think that it can be harmful for children. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?