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Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie charts show the results of a survey in which undergraduates and postgraduates were asked about the range of books and non-printed materials in their school library. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie charts show the results of a survey in which undergraduates and postgraduates were asked about the range of books and non-printed materials in their school library. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #results #survey #undergraduates #postgraduates #range #books #materials #school #library #information #features #comparisons
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The pie charts illustrate the percentage of undergraduate or postgraduate students
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 felt
their
Change the word
the
show examples
 documents in their library were good or not.
Overall
Linking Words
, the proportion of positive responses from undergraduate students for their non-print materials ranked the highest,
while
Linking Words
 the figure for higher studies alumni rating bad for their non-print materials took the lowest position. A more detailed look at the charts clearly shows that the
number
Use synonyms
 of postgraduate pupils giving positive responses for documents accounted for approximately 20%.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of undergraduate students who voted for non-printed books was the highest
while
Linking Words
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of written books took the second position. The former was 37% and the latter was 68%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the proportion of both undergraduate and higher studies pupils
felt
Correct pronoun usage
who felt
show examples
 satisfied about their materials in paper or advanced technology accounted for 20% to 30%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, 20% of alumni have not finished their studies at university rating negative for both types of documents,
while
Linking Words
 the rate of
postgraduate
Fix the agreement mistake
postgraduates
show examples
 feeling that they can not learn anything from books in the library was 30% higher.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
number
Use synonyms
 of files in advanced technology was 62%.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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