The government should put a tax on unhealthy food to encourage people to have healthy life. Do you agree or disagree?

#government #tax #food #people #life

Motivating society

for having

Change preposition

to have

show examples

healthy

Correct article usage

a healthy

show examples

lifsytle

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

with

Change preposition

show examples

putting

tax

Add an article

a tax

show examples

on unhealthy

food

Correct article usage

the athorities

show examples

athorities

Correct your spelling

authorities

would be one way to increase the level of health.

However

, I think

this

way is not effective for two areas.

Firstly

,It is argued that If a kind of

food

contained a

tax

, many

people

would be reluctant to buy it As it

becames

Correct your spelling

becomes

became

costly. But, it is undeniable that a

plenthora

Correct your spelling

plethora

of healthy foods are more expensive than

junk

food

even with

tax

As a result

people

tend to buy

junk

foods

Fix the agreement mistake

food

show examples

instead

. I think, if

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

implemented some strategies about reducing the price of

ingridient

Correct your spelling

ingredients

ingredient

for preparing healthy

food

public

Add an article

the public

show examples

would not tend to buy

junk

food

since

that

Correct determiner usage

those

show examples

foods are not affordable any more and they are able to buy

nurtritious

Correct your spelling

nutritious

food

instead

Secoundly

Correct your spelling

Secondly

, I concede that many crowds tend to buy unhealthy

food

due to

its taste regardless

its

Change preposition

of its

show examples

harms

Fix the agreement mistake

harm

show examples

Government

Add an article

The government

show examples

could show the risks of fast

food

for

body

Add an article

the body

show examples

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

for

heart

Correct article usage

the heart

show examples

and its impact on obesity, by

planing

Correct your spelling

planning

show examples

some relevant

program

Fix the agreement mistake

programs

show examples

film

Fix the agreement mistake

films

show examples

on TV or social media.

This

strategy not only

persuade

Correct subject-verb agreement

persuades

show examples

people

to eat

Correct your spelling

healthier

healthire

Correct your spelling

healthy

food

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

strongly impact on children and

youngerters

Correct your spelling

youngsters

since they use social media more than

adaults

Correct your spelling

adults

and follow many channels or pages. In conclusion,

although

It is claimed that

Correct article usage

the

show examples

government

by allocating

tax

to unhealthy stuff can persuade

people

to have

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

lifestyle, I wholeheartedly believe that putting

tax

Correct article usage

a tax

show examples

is not an effective way since healthy

food

often is more expensive than

junk

food

and

also

junk

food

is more tasty.

Government

Correct article usage

The government

show examples

should have some

aproaches

Correct your spelling

approaches

to reduce the price of nutritious stuff to make it affordable

compare

Change the form of the verb

compared

show examples

to unhealthy

food

. In

adidition

Correct your spelling

addition

athourities

Correct your spelling

athletes

by using social media and

design

Wrong verb form

designing

show examples

a related programs

Correct the article-noun agreement

related programs

a related program

show examples

can prevent society

to eat

Change preposition

from eating

show examples

unhealthy stuff.

Submitted by Maral.qanbarii1992 on Sat Aug 03 2024

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Work on improving the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. This will help in presenting stronger and more persuasive arguments.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use linking phrases to guide the reader through your essay smoothly.

organization

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content

The main points are valid and relevant to the topic.

task response

The essay acknowledges opposing views, which shows critical thinking.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
42Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The government should put a tax on unhealthy food to encourage people to have healthy life. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some companies have uniforms for their staff which must be worn at all times. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from TV as well as from international sporting competitions. To what extent do you agree?Find essays with the same topic

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? Provide relevant examples if necessary

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a job.On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Disscuss both sides and give your opinion.