Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
All individuals in the world have health troubles and prefer several ways how they can solve
this
problem. One part choose
Change the verb form
chooses
alternative
medicine
, while
for others it's better to go to the doctor. In this
essay, I would like to describe if alternative
medicine
more
useful than traditional or not.
Add a missing verb
is more
Transition
from Add an article
The transition
alternative
to traditional medicine
is one of the most popular trend
. Change to a plural noun
trends
Moreover
, in some countries
Add a comma
countries,
alternative
medicine
is the basic type of treatment
. Of course, there are some obvious factors that influence on
it. Change preposition
apply
Firstly
, alternative
treatment
is cheaper than the other types. Also
, the person who has negative
experience
after doctor Add an article
a negative
visiting
, will prefer non-traditional Wrong verb form
visits
medicine
, because of mistrust of doctors. That is
other
reason precisely why Change the wording
another
the
Correct article usage
apply
alternative
treatment
becomes
more and more popular and highly demanded. Wrong verb form
is becoming
For example
, in some poor regions such
as India and Africa, all the hospitals are private, according to
this
, for people with not enough amount of money this
type of medicine
is unavailable that's why they try to find other ways of treatment
like yoga and needle medicine
.
On the other hand
, alternative
medicine
can cause negative impact
too. It has some unpredictable drawbacks, some side effects can have a serious effect on health and reduce immunity. Another problem is that not all the doctors in Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
this
sphere have a professional education, furthermore
if we talk about poor regions, the majority of Add a comma
furthermore,
this
fake doctors have no professional skills at all. Correct determiner usage
these
Besides
, the low price of this
type of treatment
casts doubt on its effectiveness.
In conclusion, while
both sides have their merits, I believe that it will be negative
development because there is no one better to deal with your problem Correct article usage
a negative
as
a Change preposition
than
highly-qualified
doctor in Correct your spelling
highly qualified
the
real hospital.Correct article usage
a
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task response
Your essay provides a balanced view on the topic with reasons and examples, which demonstrates a good understanding of the task. However, you should work on organizing your ideas more clearly to improve the logical flow.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the ideas within paragraphs are logically connected. This will help improve the coherence and cohesion of your essay.
task response
There are a few grammatical errors and awkward phrasings. Pay attention to sentence structure and verb tenses to enhance clarity and precision in your writing. You might also want to expand on your examples to provide more detailed support for your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, which helps structure the response clearly.
task achievement
You provide relevant arguments for both the positive and negative aspects of alternative medicine, which shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The use of examples from specific regions helps to illustrate your points effectively and adds credibility to your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.