The increase in mobile phone use in recent years has led to many social problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In
this
modern
world
, the usage of technology is constantly on the
rise
. Everyone nowadays equips themselves with a smartphone as an all-in-one device for both work and entertainment needs. It is disagreed that the
rise
of mobile
phone
users is leading to many social problems. Analysing the development of telecommunication systems,
as well as
the many benefits of
smartphones
will prove
this
.
Firstly
, the
rise
of telecommunication systems has reduced the distance of connection between people around the
world
.
For instance
, family members can easily connect to their loved ones in any corner of the
world
with a simple
phone
call.
Additionally
, with the growth of the Internet,
phone
calls can be upgraded to video calls, where people can share their experiences from a place they are currently visiting
while
talking to their friends at the same time.
As a result
, writing letters and sending postcards are being replaced by social network posting and high-quality video-sharing platforms.
Secondly
, it is undeniable that
smartphones
nowadays can replace many personal needs from work to entertainment.
For example
, we can take a bus to school
while
listening to our favourite song on the
phone
at the same time.
Furthermore
, with the vast resources on the Internet nowadays,
smartphones
have become our gateway to the
world
with a simple tap on the screen.
Therefore
, the benefits
smartphones
bring to humans outweigh their drawbacks. In conclusion, the
rise
of mobile
phone
use is an inevitable trend as it was a result of many years of the development of telecom networks and the adaption of users' behaviour.
Therefore
, the idea of social problems caused by mobile phones cannot be supported. After a thorough analysis of
this
subject, it is predicted that
this
trend will continue to
rise
in the future and smartphone users will only increase year by year.
Submitted by xbinh91 on

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task achievement
Consider including a counter-argument to provide a more balanced perspective. This will strengthen your position and show that you have considered different viewpoints.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph support that idea. This will improve the logical structure of your essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your argument.
task achievement
You have provided specific examples to support your arguments, such as the use of video calls and the convenience of smartphones.

Your opinion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • face-to-face interactions
  • social skills
  • personal relationships
  • mental health issues
  • anxiety and depression
  • distractions
  • cyberbullying
  • productivity
  • learning outcomes
  • communication
  • access to information
  • professional growth
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