It is important that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30, as this is the best both for the individual and for society. Do you agree or disagree?

It is thought that
marriage
has an impact on a person's
life
. The statistics say that
people
push
people
under 30 years old to get married which helps them to live a good and happy
life
with their partners. I disagree with
this
opinion and will explain my view in
this
essay. First and foremost, I believe that there is no suitable age for
marriage
.
Consequently
, the role that all
people
take to encourage
people
is not applicable.
Firstly
, to find a partner to share with them all your
life
and memories can’t be decided by others. The wrong choice
maybe
Correct your spelling
may
show examples
converts
Wrong verb form
convert
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
to disaster
in addition
,
destroy
Change preposition
to destroying
show examples
all his
ambitious
Replace the word
ambitions
show examples
.
According to
many surveys, a lot of divorce cases are caused by early
marriage
.
Thus
, the date is not a crucial factor in classifying the success or unsuccess
marriage
.
On the other hand
, All
people
would like to find a partner to live with them the optimal
life
.
Therefore
, The specific time to create a family depends on the person whom your heart knocks with them.
For example
, I know several friends and relatives who live peacefully and
happy
Change the word
happily
show examples
. One time I asked them about the secret of success relation. The major factors were understanding and appreciation.
To sum up
, I always repeat that age isn’t the crucial role in encouraging
people
to get married there are several important factors that take into account to get a healthy relationship. I mentioned in my essay above the main point in my view.
Submitted by ahmedom3991 on

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task response
Ensure you clearly state your position in the introduction. Although you disagree with the statement, make sure to outline the reasons briefly in the introduction for better clarity.
coherence cohesion
Work on using clear signposting (e.g., 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' 'In conclusion,') throughout the essay to improve the logical flow between ideas and paragraphs.
task response
Provide specific examples to support your points. For instance, include more detailed statistics or anecdotal evidence. This can help strengthen your argument and task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. Minor grammatical errors can disrupt the flow and clarity of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in giving your argument a proper structure.
task response
You made your position clear and provided reasons for your disagreement with the statement, which is essential for task response.
task response
The use of personal anecdotes and examples from friends and relatives makes your essay engaging and relatable.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fertility
  • Maternal health
  • Psychological stability
  • Social maturity
  • Economic benefits
  • Shared responsibilities
  • Ancestral customs
  • Cultural imperatives
  • Personal development
  • Career establishment
  • Societal norms
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Divorce rates
  • Life decisions
  • Subjective wellbeing
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