In recent years, technology has significantly transformed the way people communicate. Some believe that these changes have brought more advantages than disadvantages, while others argue the opposite. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The rise in
digital
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the digital
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era has brought enormous changes in the way
of
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apply
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people
interact
each
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with each
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other.
However
, the advances
of
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in
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technological transformation
is
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are
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showing various concerns regarding the positive and negative impacts in terms of communication. One of the foremost benefits of
technology
is the flexibility. Our current generation is no longer isolated from a single tool to communicate,
such
as through handwritten
letter
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letters
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only that has been used in the past. At present, various devices and apps have provided more broad ways to obtain information from somebody.
Additionally
, the desired information that can be conveyed to the
recepients
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recipients
recipient
immediately has shown the magnificent feature in terms of speed.
Furthermore
, our current
technology
is not only able to transmit information via texts or audio
,
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apply
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but
also
face-to-face
interaction
has enabled
people
to talk interactively
as
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in
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a
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apply
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real time
Add a hyphen
real-time
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, despite
of
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apply
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the distance. With all the cutting-edge
innovation
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innovations
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in
technology
, a concern regarding human social
interaction
has attracted some
people
to argue
the
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about the
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development of
technology
we are having today.
For instance
,
people
are
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apply
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no longer spend
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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time in direct
interaction
, and
thus
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
interaction
Fix the agreement mistake
interactions
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that
involves
Correct subject-verb agreement
involve
show examples
emotional
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emotion
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has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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been disrupted. In my point of view, we
couldn't
Wrong verb form
can't
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avoid the progress of technological improvement we are having at the moment, and the only way to face the challenges is to have a knack to adapt in today's development by not eliminating the value of human
interaction
by balancing both ways of communication via digital and through direct
interaction
. In summary, since the development of
technology
has fostered the flexibility and speed of communication through digital tools, we
also
should be aware
about
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of
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mitigating the risk of eliminating
emotional
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the emotional
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value of direct
interaction
by having the skills to adapt in today's era.
Submitted by fakhruddinmasse on

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relevant specific examples
It would benefit your essay to dive deeper into specific examples supporting your points. For instance, mention particular technologies or platforms that exemplify your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Some punctuation and sentence structure errors were present. Reviewing grammar and ensuring sentences flow smoothly can improve clarity.
complete response
While the conclusion summarizes your points effectively, reinforcing the argument with one or two strong concluding statements would strengthen your essay.
introduction conclusion present
There is a clear introduction outlining the topic and a neat conclusion summarizing the main points.
complete response
You have effectively discussed both views and provided your opinion, fulfilling the task requirements.
logical structure
The structure of your essay flows logically with appropriate paragraphing and transitions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • transform the way
  • instant connectivity
  • democratized information
  • over-reliance
  • interpersonal skills
  • digital platforms
  • real-time updates
  • social isolation
  • misinformation
  • constant connectivity
  • mental health challenges
  • balance
  • maximize benefits
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