IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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The
internet
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 has become ubiquitous in modern society, resulting in the abandonment of
newspapers
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. Whether or not
this
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 is beneficial for us, is a moot point.
However
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,
this
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 essay agrees with
this
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 sentiment
due to
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 the reasons the upcoming paragraphs elaborate on.
To begin
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 with, technology offers a more convenient and flexible method for a community to receive daily news and
information
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 as everyone would have easy access to websites or social media.
This
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 is of paramount importance because it could inculcate curiosity in the younger generations and prevent them from being ignorant towards global issues. To illustrate, students at boarding schools are capable of acquiring
information
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 regarding the recent Olympic games through the
Internet
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, without having to buy
newspapers
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 outside. In essence, the digital revolution has transformed the way we access
information
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 and made it much more effortless.
Furthermore
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, halting the production of
newspapers
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 would be an advantageous movement to save the deteriorating Earth, as producing it entails numerous barks from trees. By converting to the
internet
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 for news dissemination, individuals are able to minimise the usage of papers and eventually abstain from the rise of global temperatures
due to
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 a severe loss in flora.
Besides
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,
this
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 would mitigate the effects of climate change that have detrimental consequences to humans and animals. One instance that exemplifies
this
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 is the reduction of wildlife habitat that will cause extinction. To put it another way, obtaining
information
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 from devices is more environmentally friendly than
newspapers
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. In conclusion, in light of what has been discussed,
although
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newspapers
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 might be more comfortable for some people, it is worth noting that the
Internet
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 brings substantial benefits to society and environmental sustainability.

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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear position in response to the prompt and demonstrates good control of the language. To improve further, ensure your examples are more specific and directly related to your main points. For instance, you could provide statistics or specific studies to back up your claims about internet access fostering curiosity in younger generations.
coherence cohesion
The coherence and cohesion of your essay are commendable. Each paragraph flows logically from one to the next, and your use of cohesive devices helps to link ideas effectively. To achieve a higher score, try to vary the types of linking words and phrases you use to avoid repetition and demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, making it easy to follow your argument from introduction to conclusion.
task achievement
You effectively present and support your main points, contributing to a strong overall response to the task.
task achievement
The environmental argument was particularly strong and added depth to your essay. It showed an understanding of wider issues related to the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Access
  • Convenient
  • Fast
  • Expensive
  • Wider range
  • News sources
  • Perspectives
  • Readership
  • Demographics
  • Physical
  • Tangible
  • Reading experience
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