Some people think young people should be free to choose their job, while others believe that they should be realistic and think about their future. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In today’s fast-paced world,
career
choices are a major concern for many young
people
.
While
some argue that youth should have the freedom to pursue their passions, others believe it is more important to make pragmatic decisions that ensure a stable
future
.
This
essay will discuss both perspectives and argue that a balance between passion and practicality is the best approach. It will first explore the benefits of allowing young
people
to follow their interests,
then
consider the importance of making realistic choices based on
future
prospects. On the one hand, allowing young
people
to choose their own
career
paths promotes creativity and personal
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
.
For example
, many successful individuals,
such
as entrepreneurs and artists, achieved greatness by following their passions, even when others doubted their decisions. When young
people
have the freedom to pursue their interests, they are more likely to be motivated and innovative in their work.
Therefore
, giving them the liberty to choose their careers can lead to personal satisfaction and societal progress.
On the other hand
, there is a strong argument for taking a more realistic approach to
career
planning, especially given the uncertainties of today’s job market.
For instance
, pursuing a highly competitive or unstable field,
such
as acting or professional sports, may result in financial struggles and limited job opportunities. As
such
, it is essential for young
people
to consider their long-term
future
and focus on careers that offer stability and growth. A more pragmatic approach ensures they are prepared for life’s challenges and can secure their financial independence. In conclusion,
while
it is important for young
people
to have the freedom to explore their passions, it is equally crucial to be realistic about their
future
career
prospects. By balancing personal interests with practical considerations, they can achieve both job satisfaction and financial security. Ultimately, finding
this
balance is the key to a fulfilling and stable
career
.
Submitted by hibana2077 on

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task achievement
Your essay is very well-structured and clearly addresses both perspectives of the topic. However, you could enhance the depth of your argument by providing more specific examples and elaborating on them to strengthen your points further.
coherence cohesion
Consider using more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your arguments smoothly. This can enhance the flow and ensure that your points are seamlessly connected.
task achievement
To achieve a higher score, you could incorporate counterarguments and address potential criticisms of each viewpoint. This would showcase a more comprehensive understanding of the topic and provide a balanced discussion.
introduction conclusion present
You have effectively introduced the topic and provided a clear thesis statement, which sets the stage for your discussion.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points and reinforces your position, providing a strong closing to your essay.
logical structure
Your essay is logically structured with well-defined paragraphs that are relevant to the task. Each point is supported with clear arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • career trajectory
  • job satisfaction
  • employment prospects
  • financial stability
  • job security
  • economically viable
  • harnessing potential
  • labor market
  • vocational guidance
  • real-world demands
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