Some people think the increasing business and cultural contact between countries brings many positive effects . Others say it causes the loss of national identities.Discuss both of these views and give your own opnion.

With tense relationships intensifying among countries, the pros and cons of
globalisation
have become a hot topic again. Some people argue that international communications will hinder the cultivation of national identities.
This
may sound plausible, but I do not completely agree with that.
On the contrary
, I believe it is
globalisation
that has shaped our national identities and led us to appreciate the diversity of the world. There might be little disputes if we argue that it is international communications that endow us with the opportunity to realise and appreciate the varieties of beauty.
This
is clearly exemplified in the comparison of ancient Greek sculptures and traditional Chinese paintings. The attraction of the former lies in their dexterity in creating illusions of reality through the use of foreshortening,
while
that of the latter mainly lies in offering an occasion for you to experience and reflect your own subtle feelings. Without cultural contact between different states, I could not see how we would experience the diversity of beauty without cultural interactions between nations. As for the criticism that business and cultural contact will undermine our sense of belonging to our countries, I do not think
this
is a reasonable assumption as history clearly indicates the opposite. Our conception of the nation did not exist until about the nineteenth century when nations with vastly different cultures encountered each other unexpectedly and gradually realised that "I" am peculiar, and there are others in unfamiliar places. Rooted in
this
perception, the concept of the national state has gradually become a common sense. It is easy to draw from the illustration that it is cultural and business contact, rather than isolation, that has shaped our patriotism. To summarize, in my eyes,
globalisation
has emancipated us from the obsession with ourselves and led us to a colourful world. It is living in
such
a diverse world that we have opportunities to realise our own peculiarities and develop national identities.
Therefore
, let us embrace
globalisation
, which has been a trustful friend for many years.
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task achievement
While the essay provides a complete and relevant response to the task, there is room for deeper exploration of both points of view. Elaborating more on the potential negative impacts of losing national identities could make the essay more balanced.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates clear and comprehensive ideas, but avoid overgeneralizing points or leaving assumptions unsupported. Strengthening your argument with more specifics can enhance clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay's logical structure is strong, but consider using more transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument more fluidly.
coherence cohesion
The introduction sets the stage effectively, and the conclusion summarizes the main points succinctly.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides well-supported main points and relevant examples to illustrate arguments, making it compelling and insightful.
task achievement
The response to the task is comprehensive and relevant, showcasing a deep understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Clear, insightful points with well-chosen, relevant examples strengthen the essay's argument.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic growth
  • cultural exchange
  • foreign investment
  • job creation
  • international relationships
  • political cooperation
  • global stability
  • national identity
  • cultural homogenization
  • erosion of local traditions
  • global brands
  • local customs
  • diverse cultures
  • heritage
  • historical continuity
  • globalization
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