Reserarch show that some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people engage in unhealthy activities. what is the causes of this ? what can be done ?

Nowadays, the number of research studies has increased. One of these studies indicates that some
activities
are good for health and others are harmful, Despite
this
knowledge, many
people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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participate in
harmul
Correct your spelling
harmful
activities
. Based on
this
there are many reasons that lead to
this
issue
and there are many solutions to tackle it. These days, a new habit has emerged, which is
addiction
Add an article
an addiction
the addiction
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to various
activities
, and one main cause of
this
issue
is the lack of awareness. To explain, some
people
may become addicted to harmful
activities
, making it difficult for them to quit.
For example
, smoking is one harmful habit that a person may become addicted to, finding it difficult to quit or not knowing how to quit. To tackle
this
issue
, the government should raise awareness about how
people
can abandon harmful
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
and adopt healthier ones.
For instance
, they can introduce a subject in schools to educate students on how to break bad habits and avoid them in the future. The second reason is that influencers can encourage individuals, especially children, to engage in unhealthy
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
. Nowadays, many famous
people
perform harmful challenges on social media, and children imitate them.
For example
, a new trend has emerged where
people
hit others and leave them to cry to see who cries the most, record videos of it, and
then
share them. To solve
this
issue
, the government should implement policies that limit the availability of
such
unhealthy
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
show examples
, including stricter regulations on the types of challenges allowed on social media.
To sum up
,
although
there are many bad actions
people
do, there are many ways to tackle
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
.
Submitted by alharrasialanood7 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve clarity and coherence, try to arrange your points more logically and ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly from one idea to the next.
task achievement
Attempt to elaborate further on the main causes and potential solutions with a variety of supporting details to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides an introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion clearly.
task achievement
Relevant examples, such as those related to smoking and social media challenges, enhance the argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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