IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

There is a problem with the changing rooms in the sports centre that you visit. You have complained several times but with no success. Write a letter to the manager of the sports centre. In your letter: describe what the problem with the changing rooms is say what happened the last times you complained explain what you want the manager to do.

Dear Sir or Madam I am writing to complain
about
Correct pronoun usage
about this
show examples
. Dissatisfaction with the condition of the changing rooms at your sports centre. Changing rooms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
show examples
 problems. The floors are often dirty, no one cleans
this
Linking Words
room
Use synonyms
,
I
Correct word choice
and I
show examples
do not know what they do. There is so much broken glass in these rooms that no one can
fix
Correct pronoun usage
fix it
show examples
.
Doors
Correct article usage
The doors
show examples
 do not lock at all in bad condition. The atmosphere in the
room
Use synonyms
 is very bad,
then
Linking Words
 it is difficult to breathe. There are talented athletes, but there is no changing
room
Use synonyms
 for them. I have been asking you to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem for a long time. They promised to address the problem, but nothing has changed. It's a shame that the support team at
such
Linking Words
 a large company
so
Add a missing verb
is so
show examples
 slow. I only ask you one thing: to fix the changing
room
Use synonyms
 for the athletes. I look forward to your reply and a resolution to my problem.
Your
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
 faithfully Hayotbek

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Try to structure your letter more logically. For example, discuss each problem separately in different paragraphs and ensure each paragraph flows naturally into the next.
task achievement
Although you provided a good amount of detail about the problems, aim to be more specific and clear in your descriptions. For example, specify when you complained and to whom.
task achievement
Use a formal tone consistently throughout your letter. Words like 'dissatisfaction' and 'athletes' are good, but casual phrases like 'what they do' could be more formal as 'what their role entails.'
coherence cohesion
A clear opening and closing, which fit the formal nature of the complaint letter, were well-executed.
task achievement
The letter covers all points required by the task prompt: describing the problem, mentioning previous complaints, and asking for a resolution.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • frequent user
  • specific issues
  • cleanliness
  • hygiene
  • broken facilities
  • lack of supplies
  • address the issue
  • response
  • emphasize
  • well-maintained
  • comfort
  • hygiene
  • politely
  • firmly
  • request
  • resolve
  • prompt resolution
  • discuss
What to do next:
Look at other essays: