Some people think that when recruiting, companies should aim to take on people who are innovative and able to work independently, while others consider that they should recruit people who are able to work in a team and follow instructions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the drive to produce
a
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apply
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good productivity, there is conflict regarding
the
Correct word choice
whether the
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business should enrol people who
is
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are
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more
on
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apply
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individualistic or
cooperate
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cooperative
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individuals.
Any way
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Anyway
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, I believe that in terms of efficiency, both are important to the companies. In the following paragraph, I will explain
on
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both views in detail. From one point of view,
a
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an
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individual who is innovative and independent will likely
to
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increase competitiveness and
productivities
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productivity
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in the firm. As
for
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the
Correct article usage
a
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result,
this
allows an employee to challenge themselves and enhance skills
such
as creativity and problem-solving skills.
Moreover
, a worker can boost their confidence and build a sense of accomplishment by
surpass
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surpassing
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their colleagues.
However
, I believe that winning alone is not important.
For instance
, in
hospital
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a hospital
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, every healthcare provider needs to work together in order to save their
patients
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patient's
patients'
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live
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lives
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.
On the other hand
, teamwork is always a good trait
while
working in the big companies. As for the purpose,
such
establish can achieve consistency and minimize conflicts. In
such
situations, workmates can foster collaboration and good communication skills among them.
For example
, in the kitchen, a chef needs more than one partner to deliver a finer meal to their customers.
Therefore
, I believe that
the
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apply
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teamwork
make
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makes
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a dream work.
Thus
,
a
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apply
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good consistency allows
good
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for good
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productivities
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productivity
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. In conclusion,
Although
there is disagreement in
the
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apply
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society on
whether
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apply
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who should be enlisted. Yet, I believe that both sides play a significant part
to
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in
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fullfill
Correct your spelling
fulfilling
a role in
the
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apply
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companies by producing
a
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apply
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valuable productivity.
Therefore
,
independent
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independence
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and teamwork
is
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are
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crucial and a good value to be included.
Submitted by tifjong on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. This will help in making your argument stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining sentence structure and word choice to improve clarity and precision in your ideas. Avoid repetitiveness and focus on achieving fluency in your writing.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between sentences and paragraphs. Use more transition words and phrases to enhance coherence.
task achievement
Aim to develop your arguments in more depth. Each paragraph should clearly elaborate on one main point with specific examples and analysis.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes an introduction and conclusion, giving it a clear beginning and end.
coherence cohesion
Very good use of linking words like 'Moreover', 'However', 'For instance', and 'Therefore' to connect ideas and paragraphs.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovative
  • independent
  • creative
  • problem-solving skills
  • development
  • new ideas
  • solutions
  • productivity
  • competitiveness
  • teamwork
  • collaboration
  • communication
  • consistency
  • adherence
  • policies
  • conflicts
  • efficiency
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