Some businesses now say that no one can smoke cigarettes in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. This is a good idea but it also takes away some of our freedom. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons.

#businesses #smoke #cigarettes #offices #governments #places #idea #freedom

While

some argue that banning smoking in public areas and workplaces is beneficial,

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

believe it restricts their self-determination. In my opinion, smoking bans in those areas are a positive step. It promotes an inclusive environment and

protect

Change the verb form

protects

show examples

the public health.

To begin

with, smoking causes a

viarity

Correct your spelling

variety

of health risks,

such

as lung cancer, heart

diseases

Fix the agreement mistake

disease

show examples

and respiratory conditions.

This

can not only affect the person who smokes directly but

also

secondhand smokers,

such

as children or pregnant women.

For example

, the likelihood of developing cancer increases with every cigarette one smokes, leading to a higher number of

hospitalization

Fix the agreement mistake

hospitalizations

show examples

. In order to protect

this

vulnerable cohort smoking should be banned in those areas.

Submitted by philipp_becker on Mon Aug 05 2024

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task achievement

Your essay presents a clear standpoint, and your arguments are reasonable. Make sure to cover both sides of the argument even if you don't agree with the opposing view. This can create a more balanced discussion, enhancing your task achievement score.

coherence cohesion

Expand on your conclusion. A strong conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points and reiterates your opinion. This will improve the logical structure and overall coherence.

task achievement

Your introduction effectively sets up the main issue and presents your stance clearly, which contributes positively to task achievement.

coherence cohesion

You have logical progression in your essay, moving smoothly from one point to the next, which is key for coherence and cohesion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

114 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

restrictions
adverse health impacts
secondhand smoke
lung cancer
heart disease
respiratory conditions
inclusive environment
exacerbated
impinge
greater good
healthcare costs
productive workforce
designated smoking areas
compromise
public awareness campaigns
punitive
strategy
lifestyle choices

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Some businesses now say that no one can smoke cigarettes in any of their offices. Some governments have banned smoking in all public places. This is a good idea but it also takes away some of our freedom. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons.

Include an introduction and conclusion

There are two methods of studying, one is rote learning and the second is meaningful learning. Discuss both types of learning with examples and give your own opinion.

The proportion of income adults and children spent on 4 common items in the UK in 1998.

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effectiv

Task 2: Many people find it hard to balance their work with other parts of their lives. What are the reasons for this? How can this problem be overcome?

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?