Some people decide to start their own busniess instead of working hour for a company or organization. Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages?
Some believe that running
one
's own Use synonyms
business
is better than working for a Use synonyms
company
. In my opinion, the benefits of having Use synonyms
one
's own Use synonyms
business
outweigh the drawbacks in comparison with working hours for a Use synonyms
company
or organization. Use synonyms
This
essay will discuss both the strengths and weaknesses of Linking Words
this
thought with some relevant instances.
First of all, Linking Words
one
outstanding benefit of being an entrepreneur is gaining much more money rather than being an employee for a Use synonyms
company
. There is no doubt that why most wealthy people are Use synonyms
business
Use synonyms
owners
,not employees. Use synonyms
For example
, a man who owns an Italian Linking Words
restaurant
in Sydney could gain an income of at least 1,000 dollars a day. Use synonyms
On the other hand
, a waitress working at Linking Words
this
Linking Words
restaurant
could obtain a wage of approximately 300 dollars for a whole day. Use synonyms
Secondly
, the Linking Words
business
Use synonyms
owners
could schedule their own time with flexible working hours, because sometimes the Use synonyms
business
could be run by their employees. To exemplify Use synonyms
this
statement, the man owning that shop needs to set the direction of running the Linking Words
business
and might come to recheck how the Use synonyms
restaurant
is run by the workers twice a week,which no Use synonyms
one
definitely forces the Use synonyms
owners
to work every day. Use synonyms
As a consequence
, an owner could have more flexible time to do other preferable things compared to the workers.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, there is a noticeable drawback to Linking Words
this
belief. Linking Words
Firstly
, starting Linking Words
one
's own Use synonyms
company
absolutely requires an enormous budget to settle the Use synonyms
business
at the beginning of the period;Use synonyms
however
,being a waitress at the Linking Words
restaurant
does not require any proof of statement,just having some experience in hospitality is a plus. Undoubtedly, starting Use synonyms
one
's own coffee shop in Sydney demands a number of considerations Use synonyms
such
as renting a building,purchasing a coffee machine, hiring many workers to work at the front Linking Words
as well as
taking care of the kitchen section, and decorating the shop. Linking Words
As a result
,settling Linking Words
one
Use synonyms
business
might demand much budget of approximately 20,000-30,000 dollars at the starting period.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, I personally think that the benefits of starting Linking Words
one
's own Use synonyms
business
outweigh the drawbacks in the long term in case of gaining huge income and the flexibility of working hours. Use synonyms
Nevertheless
,those advantages depend on how well the Linking Words
owners
handle their own Use synonyms
business
and many relevant factors including economy and Use synonyms
business
trends.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a smooth transition between ideas and paragraphs to enhance coherence. For example, between the benefits and drawbacks, a sentence that guides the reader through the shift could be helpful.
task achievement
While the main points are clear and supported, try to develop them in greater detail. Adding more examples and expanding on the existing ones can strengthen the task response.
general
Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and typos, such as 'busniess' instead of 'business' and missing spaces after commas. Proofreading can help catch these small mistakes.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are well-structured, providing a clear framework for the essay.
complete response
The essay successfully addresses the prompt, discussing both advantages and disadvantages with relevant examples.
supported main points
Main points are logically and consistently supported, which strengthens the argument presented.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.