some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. why is this the case?do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Smartphones spread among adults and
children
equally, but the effects are more obvious on the latter which is logical regarding their young age. Some parents believe providing their kids
with mobile phones
can benefit safety and education. In my opinion, I disagree with this
view for many reasons that will be explained alongside a few factors of this
phenomenon.
To begin
with, children
's addiction is the major reason why they spend too much time on their phones
, and this
is because given
the device from a very young age complicates it on Verb problem
apply
kids
to quit it after that since they have no autonomy over themselves. Moreover
, the features and characteristics smartphones contain astonish young pupils. Like, the brightness, shininess, various games, and the ability to chat with their friends. All of these advantages encourage kids
to spend hours switching between all of these different features without feeling tedious.
In terms of the drawbacks of this
development, lads should not waste numerous hours on the screen due to
the detrimental impacts it has on physical and mental health. For example
, a lack of concentration is caused by children
's sprees on their phones
without paying attention to what is happening around them as well as
laziness and indolence, leading to obesity because of the kids
' estrangement from exercising. Additionally
, affecting on the lads' mentality and behaviors
, regarding their young age, inexperience, and the facility to pursue them, especially with the appearance of social media that does not emphasize Change the spelling
behaviours
children
's content supervision For instance
, if most of the videos that the child watches consist violence, he will tend to have aggressive actions, and this
is because these meta forms do are not concern about the child's ethics.
To sum up
, mobile phones
danger occurs
when it is misused, and Correct subject-verb agreement
occur
that is
what we can not prevent kids
from doing all the time even if we take the appropriate precautions, they will always find a way to deepen in it is darkness. So, we must not allow them to have one before making sure they are aware enough how
to employ it in the right way.Change preposition
of how
Submitted by salmanasrnasr on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents your opinion more strongly, and outline the main points that will be discussed in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Improve the transitions between paragraphs and main ideas to enhance the essay's flow.
general
Make sure to proofread for grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to improve clarity and comprehension.
task achievement
The essay provides relevant and specific examples to support the main points.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a logical structure with clear topic sentences and supporting details.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!