It has been claimed that workers over 50 are not responsive to rapidly changing ideas in the modern workplace and that for this reason younger workers are to be preferred.

#workers #workplace #reason

These days, there has been a

distpute

Correct your spelling

dispute

youngers

Correct your spelling

younger

show examples

workers

are preferred

than

Change preposition

over

show examples

older

workers

above 50. Many individuals claim that the

idea

Fix the agreement mistake

ideas

show examples

generated by older groups

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

too classic compared to

new

Add an article

a new

the new

show examples

generation

however

, I strongly argue that

workers

over 50 retain a diversity of skills to apply from their experiences.

To begin

, older

workers

retain a wide range of databases to analyse modern cases.

For example

, they could have gone through harsh issues, so they may find the best approach to solve the problem, but

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation

struggle

Change the verb form

struggles

show examples

to give an answer.

Hence

, suited solutions would be treated as their advantages to give their opinions widely with the

cofidence

Correct your spelling

confidence

In addition

, experienced

workers

have specialised skills to produce

Remove the article

apply

show examples

creative

thought

Fix the agreement mistake

thoughts

show examples

. Since they have joined the identical company in a long period, they are aware of a change in the future trend, leading to

give

Verb problem

apply

show examples

a close estimate.

For instance

, older groups may have finished the market research earlier, so outcomes are more concise and accurate to be used as the main point.

In contrast

, the new

generation

learn

Change the verb form

learns

show examples

from various resources

such

as a laptop and iPad, but newspaper.

Thus

, it is more exposed by numerous scandals, yielding to produced

insipiring

Correct your spelling

inspiring

proposals, but it might be insignificant in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

real life as most of them are unrealistic. In conclusion, there is a controversy that

older

Correct article usage

the older

show examples

generation

are

Change the verb form

show examples

weak in terms of modern ideas.

Although

they do not acquire global cases, their advantages are strong

enoguh

Correct your spelling

enough

to cover their weaknesses.

Submitted by az7082687 on Wed Aug 07 2024

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Language

To achieve a higher score, work on improving sentence structures and addressing minor grammatical errors. Clear and error-free sentences make your arguments easier to understand and follow.

Coherence and Cohesion

Revisit the introduction and conclusion to ensure they are clear and effectively summarize the main points. Well-constructed introductions and conclusions can enhance the overall structure of your essay.

Task Achievement

Develop the argument further by providing more detailed examples and explanations. This can help in making your essay more persuasive and demonstrating a deeper engagement with the topic.

Task Achievement

Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic by addressing both the advantages of older workers and the capabilities of younger workers.

Coherence and Cohesion

The paragraphs are logically structured, and there is a clear progression of ideas.

Task Achievement

You provided relevant examples to support your points, which helps in illustrating your arguments effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It has been claimed that workers over 50 are not responsive to rapidly changing ideas in the modern workplace and that for this reason younger workers are to be preferred.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many young people say that mobile phones are the most important object that they own. Does the popularity of mobile phones among young people have more advantages or disadvantages?

Many people put their personal information online (address, telephone number, and so on) for purposes such as signing up for social networks or online banking. Is this a positive or negative development?

Consumers are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think consumers are influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.