Some people believe that one of the best ways to solve environmental problem is to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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While
it is widely suggested the most effective
solution
to tackle
with
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apply
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environmental
issue
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issues
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is to
rise
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raise
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the costs of fuels used for various vehicles, others argue that implementing
of
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apply
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alternative energy
resource
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resources
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is much better
to prevent
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for preventing
show examples
any lethal carbon
emission
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emissions
show examples
. The reason why I support
with
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apply
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the latter statement about the
beneficial
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benefits
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of other energy resources will
further
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be further
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discussed in
this
essay.
To begin
with, it may seem sensible for some to believe that using the
demand supply
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demand-supply
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principle to
limited
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limit
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the use of fuels.
This
is possibly because the more expensive the
fuel
is, the
lesser
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less
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the cars will be on the road.
Therefore
, the ownership of private cars nowadays could be the main factor in creating
pollutions
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pollution
show examples
that
exploited
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exploits
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the
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apply
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nature
such
as air and water quality,
as a consequence
, it is understandable that
with
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apply
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extra
dollar
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dollars
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paid for
the
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apply
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fuel
could prohibit
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the the
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the the
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apply
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demand for using cars. Take Amsterdam,
for example
; as the oil price
surge
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surges
show examples
globally, they change the way they commute from car to bicycle. As a
results
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result
show examples
, there is an
evident
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evidence
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shown
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showing
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that the air quality improved tremendously.
However
, I personally argue in favour of the detrimental impact of promoting extra charge for
fuel
seeing that it can lead to some adverse effect of adaption to reduce costs from the local. To simply explain,
peoples
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people
show examples
are flexible in finding ways to create cost-effective
solution
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solutions
show examples
for them, which
sometime
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sometimes
show examples
this
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apply
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could bring about
the
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a
show examples
negative outcome
instead
. The
hand made
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hand-made
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diesel oil,
for instance
,
though
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through
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the application of using old
fuel
and alcohol to create low-cost oil, there is a report
of
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apply
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the
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that
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using
such
fuel
could create a lethal fume and smoke that
effect
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affect
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the globe as they are not completely combusted.
This
is the reason why I recommend
to use
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using
show examples
the
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apply
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alternative
source
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sources
show examples
such
as sunlight energy to create a more
environmental
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environmentally
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friendly
solution
and
cost effective
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cost-effective
show examples
solution
. In summary,
although
it is undeniable that
charges
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charging
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extra cost for fuels can be an effective
solution
for environmental problems, I am of the opinion that
instead
it
create
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creates
show examples
more dreadful
problem
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problems
show examples
in future and better applied alternative natural
resource
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resources
show examples
to
fuel
the vehicles
such
as sunlight
instead
in order to create
a
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an
show examples
environmental friendly society with
a appropriate costs
Correct the article-noun agreement
appropriate costs
an appropriate cost
show examples
.
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on

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grammar
Revise sentences for grammatical accuracy and clarity. Some sentences are currently awkward and difficult to understand due to errors in grammar and syntax.
task response
Strengthen the argument by providing more concrete examples and evidence to support your points. This will make your essay more persuasive and impactful.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has one clear main idea. Some paragraphs in the essay contain multiple ideas, which can make the argument difficult to follow.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of sentence structures to make your writing more engaging. Currently, many sentences have similar structures, which makes the writing feel repetitive.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which help guide the reader through your essay. This is critical for coherence and cohesion.
task response
You addressed the prompt effectively, discussing both sides of the argument and clearly stating your opinion. This demonstrates a good understanding of the task.
task response
Your essay contained relevant examples, such as the case of Amsterdam's switch from cars to bicycles, which help support your arguments.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental sustainability
  • renewable energy
  • fossil fuels
  • public transportation
  • carbon footprint
  • economic incentives
  • alternative energy vehicles
  • fuel-efficient
  • government subsidies
  • economic disparity
  • urban planning
  • rural infrastructure
  • sustainable development
  • carbon tax
  • green technology
  • demand elasticity
  • energy conservation
  • climate change mitigation
What to do next:
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