IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The bar charts below show the number of hours each teacher spent teaching in different schools in four different countries in 2001.

The bar charts below show the number of hours each teacher spent teaching in different schools in four different countries in 2001.
#bar #show #hours #teacher #schools #four #countries
The given bar charts represent information
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 in different
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
 of
educations
Fix the agreement mistake
education
show examples
 from four nations: Japan, Spain, Iceland, and
Correct article usage
the U.S.A
show examples
U.S.A
Correct your spelling
U.S.A.
, spent on teaching in 2001.
Overall
, it can be clearly observed that
American
 teachers spent
hours
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
teaching the greatest,
whereas
 that of the others
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
relatively fluctuated
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 every academic
levels
Change to a singular noun
level
show examples
.
However
, it is interesting to note that lecturers for upper secondary students during the given time frame.
To begin
 with, at nearly 1,200
hours
,
American
 upper secondary school teachers spent the largest number of
hours
 among the other three nations, followed by, Icelandic peoples at just above 900
horus
Correct your spelling
hours
, and
Spainish
Correct your spelling
Spanish
 at 900
hours
, respectively. Meanwhile,
American
 educators for lower secondary
grade
Fix the agreement mistake
grades
show examples
 still outnumbered the rest, at about 1,000
hours
,
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 from
iceland
Change the capitalization
Iceland
show examples
 spent the fewest time on teaching at more than half of
American
Fix the agreement mistake
Americans
show examples
. Spanish and Japanese
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 spent similar figures around 700-800
hours
.
Similarly
, the trends of lower secondary
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 and primary
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 were alike,
the
Change preposition
with the
show examples
overall
 average
hours
 of
teching
Correct your spelling
teaching
 in the range of 500-700
hours
.
Submitted by kamonluck1999 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words teacher, american, hours with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!