The graph below gives information on the numbers of participants for different activities at one social centre in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
The line chart compares the number of
people
engaging differ
activities at a specific social Replace the word
in different
center
in Change the spelling
centre
capital
of Australia Melbourne from 2000 to 2020.
Add an article
the capital
Overall
, the most popular activity was film
club over the shown period. Correct article usage
the film
A
increasing trend can be seen in table tennis. Change the article
An
However
, amateur dramatics experienced a
obvious drop.
In 2000, around 63 Change the article
an
people
joined FilmClub, which was far more than the other categories. It fluctuated over the followed
20 years. Replace the word
following
Whereas
participants
was
keeping around 60 to 66 and always the number one over the period. As for martial arts, ranked second in 2000 with 36 Change the verb form
were
participants
, then
slightly declined in 2005 and kept slightly fluctuating until 2020. Remained the same people
as at beginning
. Add an article
the beginning
Additionally
, no one attended the music show performance in 2000. However
, since 2005, it dramatically increased 11
Change preposition
by 11
people
in 2010 and kept rising trend to near
20 Change the word
nearly
participants
in 2020.
It is noticeable that amateur dramatics was higher than table tennis by 10 participants
. However
, after slightly increased
, atomic dramatics rapidly decreased over 15 years to its lowest point, less than 10 Wrong verb form
increasing
participants
. Interestingly, table tennis dramatically increased to its summit about
53 Change preposition
by about
participants
from 2010 to 2020.Submitted by duzirong on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, participants with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatically" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
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