IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries, the widespread use of the internet has given people more freedom to work or study at home instead of traveling to work or college. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

#countries #internet #people #freedom #work #study #home #college
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Speaking
a second or other languages
Correct the article-noun agreement
a second or other language
second or other languages
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 rather
a
Correct word choice
than a
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mother tongue in a foreign country makes
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speaker
Correct article usage
the speaker
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to
Change the verb form
apply
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face a lot of serious social
problems
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,
besides
Linking Words
 practical
problems
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. I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
 idea because immigrants may find it difficult to
make
Verb problem
apply
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communications
Replace the word
communicate
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 with others
also
Linking Words
 they become overwhelmed
as a result
Linking Words
 of searching for social credibility among natural
speakers
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. Transferring your exact opinion
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 a foreign
language
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 is one of the harsh experiences. Having
a
Correct article usage
apply
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good
communications
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communication
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 is all about saying your opinion and showing your emotions,
however
Linking Words
, a
non-native
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speaker
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 struggles with passing on.
For example
Linking Words
,
non-
Correct your spelling
non-speakers
speakers
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' words may lead to misunderstanding, so they get away from having a pleasant interaction.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a
speaker
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 of a foreign
language
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 might face social issues
such
Linking Words
 as
,
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apply
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 getting humiliated by native ones, feeling isolated and neglected, and becoming embarrassed. Accounting a foreign
language
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speaker
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 as a poor stratum of society makes all of the
non-native
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Use synonyms
speaker
Fix the agreement mistake
speakers
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 weary.
Although
Linking Words
 some
non-native
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speakers
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, who have acceptable occupations, have a significant social credibility and
respects
Fix the agreement mistake
respect
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. If a foreign
language
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speaker
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 goes through a shopping native
speakers
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 may laugh at that person because of an unusual accent. Probably, all of the foreigners are making attempts to juggle the demands of having a good social level and living as foreign people. In conclusion, speaking in
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
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 country as a non-
speaker
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 has some social issues. All immigrants
likely
Add a missing verb
are likely
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 to have some difficulties for interaction and these
problems
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 lead to facing social issues.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
non-native
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speakers
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 do not have
a
Remove the article
apply
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social credibility.
At
Change preposition
Last
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last
Linking Words
 but not least, respecting
to
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apply
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all
non-native
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speakers
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 can be a good suggestion for preventing all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
problems
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.
Submitted by ghorabibita on

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coherence cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of your ideas. For example, use more transitional phrases to connect your thoughts more clearly.
task achievement
Make sure to illustrate your points with more relevant and specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding your main argument.
task achievement
You have addressed the task completely by discussing both social and practical problems faced by non-native speakers.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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