In some countries, there is a rising number of young people comitting crimes. What are the advantages and disadvantages from sending the young offenders to prison?

In recent times, younger generations have increasingly become involved in criminal activities, leading to a rise in incarceration rates.
This
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growing trend has sparked concern within
society
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. In
this
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essay, we will explore the benefits and drawbacks of
this
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issue. let's begin by looking at the advantages of delivering teenagers to jail. One of the main
reason
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reasons
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of
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for
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sending minor generations to prison is
protecting
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to protect
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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society
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. Students often find themselves engaged in chaos or conflicts at school, sometimes over trivial matters.
Such
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altercations can escalate into serious problems for
society
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, resulting in damage to both private and public property.
Additionally
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, the presence of stricter consequences may contribute to a safer environment, allowing individuals to walk freely at night without fear of crime. Turning to the other side of the
arguement
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argument
, human right is the problem. some argue that sending young people to prison is unnecessary, particularly regarding the human rights of those under seventeen. They assert that certain
offenses
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offences
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,
such
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as petty theft or vandalism, do not warrant criminal charges and that these individuals merely need rehabilitation to learn how to navigate societal norms.
Furthermore
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, the fund to
taking
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take
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care of those people needs more money from the
government
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. In conclusion, it is evident that the
government
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plays a crucial role in addressing
this
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issue. It is essential for the
government
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to establish stricter regulations that clearly distinguish between serious and minor crimes. Not all
offenses
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offences
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necessitate imprisonment;
instead
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, the
government
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should invest in more rehabilitation facilities and training programs, which are essential for guiding teenagers towards becoming responsible members of
society
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.

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task achievement
Consider elaborating on the main points with specific examples or statistics to support your claims regarding crime prevention and rehabilitation.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that all arguments are connected effectively, using appropriate linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your points.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors, as they can distract from your message. For example, 'arguement' should be 'argument', and 'some' should be capitalized at the beginning of a sentence.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear introduction outlining the topic and the purpose of the essay.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main arguments and suggests a practical approach for the government.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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