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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the number of trips made by children in one country in 1990 and 2010 to travel to and from school using different modes of transport. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart illustrates the
number
Use synonyms
 of travels by children from 1990 to 2010. There are five
separated
Replace the word
separate
show examples
 types of transport including
car
Use synonyms
 passenger, walking, cycling, walking and
bus
Use synonyms
, and only
bus
Use synonyms
. Units are measured in millions. Overview, in 1990, walking was the highest group among five transport with around 13
million
Use synonyms
, followed by the
bus
Use synonyms
 group with 7
million
Use synonyms
 which ranked second. The bicycle and the walking and
bus
Use synonyms
 were nearby just about 6
million
Use synonyms
.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
car
Use synonyms
 travelling was only about 4.5
million
Use synonyms
. In 2010, most modes of transportation decreased significantly but the
number
Use synonyms
 of cars used was the only group that had an upward trend. The
number
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 of
car
Use synonyms
passenger
Fix the agreement mistake
passengers
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 increased massively to 11
million
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of trips with feet, which was highest in 1990, dropped by 7
million
Use synonyms
 from 13
million
Use synonyms
 to only 6
million
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the other three categories, which were the bicycle, the foot trips, and the
bus
Use synonyms
, had
also
Linking Words
 a downward trend. In conclusion, the
number
Use synonyms
 of trips made by
car
Use synonyms
 passengers became the most popular type in 2010, followed by walking,
bus
Use synonyms
 travelling, walking and
bus
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, and cycling respectively.
In particular
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of the
last
Linking Words
 three categories was lower than in 1990.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, car, bus, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • trips
  • children
  • modes of transport
  • walk
  • cycle
  • public transport
  • drive
  • car
  • trends
  • decrease
  • increase
  • shift
  • convenient
  • comfortable
  • commuting
  • traffic congestion
  • safety concerns
  • significant
  • indicate
  • reasons
  • traffic congestion
  • safety concerns
  • 20-year period
  • doubled
  • considerable margin
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