These days, more people are going to university than in the past. They start work later in life and with higher qualifications. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

In the past, the number of
people
who went to
university
was lower than it is now.
However
, today, more
people
prefer to obtain higher qualifications by attending
university
before starting their careers. I think the benefits of
this
trend far outweigh any drawbacks. One negative aspect of going to
university
is the potential loss of time spent studying rather than gaining
work
experience. To explain, studying at the
university
takes a long time to graduate and get a certificate, which is often required by employers.
For example
, some
people
can teach before they go to
study
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
university
, which means that they don't need to
study
for five or six years to get the approval because they have the critical
skills
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
work
.
As a result
, in my opinion, it doesn't matter that I have a certificate or degree that shows my experience in the field, but my
skills
are the most important thing to get a good job.
On the other hand
, the positive aspect of studying at
university
before starting
work
is the chance to improve knowledge,
skills
and experiences. To clarify, at the
university
education teaches students important things
such
as the correct way of working, how to navigate the
work
environment and essential subjects related to their field.
For instance
, future teachers learn how they have to deal with the students.
Also
how to teach them correctly.
Consequently
, I strongly believe that individuals should
study
at
university
before going to
work
to deal with the job environment and to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
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professional
worker
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workers
show examples
in the future.
To sum up
,
although
studying at
university
helps in shaping a professional worker,
this
upside is more important than
downside
Correct article usage
the downside
show examples
that some
people
don't need to
study
at
university
because they have
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
enough
skills
to
work
.
Submitted by alharrasialanood7 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, work on the transitions between your ideas and paragraphs. This will help guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a clearer logical structure. Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea that is well-supported with explanations or examples.
task achievement
It's important to provide more balanced examples to support your arguments. This will help illustrate your points better and strengthen your essay.
task achievement
Ensure your ideas are fully developed and clearly articulated. This includes providing more detailed explanations when introducing new points.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present and summarize the main points effectively.
task achievement
You've addressed the task appropriately by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of the trend.
task achievement
Your main points are relevant to the task and provide a complete, though not exhaustive, response.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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