You have bought a new camera but when you got it home you found it some problems. You returned the camera and spoke to the company representative a week ago but the camera has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: •introduce yourself • explain the situation • say what action you would like to the company to take

#camera #home #company #representative #week #•introduce #situation #action

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Dear Sir or Madam I am writing

this

letter to report the faulty

camera

in my recent purchase from your

company

. My name is Begoyim .I

have been purchasing

Wrong verb form

purchased

show examples

the

camera

from your

company

last

week

Last

week on August 1st which was Thursday, I made the purchase of a

camera

from your

company

One

week later, as I got home and tried to take a

picture

of my cat . Unfortunately, the quality of the obtained

picture

was very unsatisfactory. That wasn't the only problem. When I tried to take another

picture

, the

picture

was taken upside down. That's ridiculous. On Monday night , I immediately

call

Wrong verb form

called

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

customer service and explained the issues with the

camera

. The staff suggested I return the

camera

back to the

company

. In return, they will either

replaced

Add a missing verb

be replaced

show examples

with

a new ones

Correct the article-noun agreement

a new one

new ones

show examples

or fixed within three days.

However

, there has been no contact back since

then

I would appreciate it provided you could either replace the

camera

with a new

one

or repair the existing

one

within

one

day. I hope to hear back from you immediately Yours faithfully Begoyim

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Fri Aug 09 2024

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coherence and cohesion

Make sure to maintain clear paragraphing, sometimes ideas got a bit mixed up.

coherence and cohesion

Start your letter with the details of your purchase right away after introducing yourself, it would be more coherent.

task achievement

Clarify what specific camera model you bought; this would exhibit more details in task response.

suitable writing tone

Polite and formal tone maintained throughout.

complete response

All parts of the task are covered sufficiently.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

188 words

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