Some people believe that countries should produce the food to feed their population themselves and import as little as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that nations should provide
food
themselves and reduce
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
of
imports
. I agree with
this
statement
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because decreasing
imports
would positively impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the environment and expand
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
of the country. To start with,
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
imports
would mean
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
emissions
thrown
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
and air. Delivering products to another country is feasible via plane, train and ship - each of which requires coal and carbon to commute.
According to
Kazakh National News, 40,000 planes solely imported
food
commodity
Fix the agreement mistake
commodities
show examples
to Kazakhstan in a year.
This
Correct pronoun usage
These
show examples
emissions
cause detrimental harm
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
nature as gas
emissions
set
advent
Correct article usage
the advent
show examples
of global warming and air pollution.
This
effect cannot be repaired,
thus
slashing
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
of
imports
would be consecutive to
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
In addition
to that, producing
food
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
homeland
Correct article usage
the homeland
show examples
will boost
countries
Replace the word
the country's
show examples
economy
. Local
food
is not opted
due
Change preposition
for due
show examples
to
over-supplied
Correct article usage
an over-supplied
show examples
international market that
incurs
Verb problem
causes
show examples
hundreds of small businesses
run
Fix the infinitive
to run
show examples
out. Leaving local fabrics on
market
Add an article
the market
show examples
as the only choice would increase
demands
Fix the agreement mistake
demand
show examples
, employment and
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
subsequently
.
This
course of action encourages the development of new factories,
farms
Correct word choice
and farms
show examples
, and
promoting
Wrong verb form
promotes
show examples
agriculture to cultivate plants naturally.
For instance
, trade commenced selling fruit and
vegetable
Fix the agreement mistake
vegetables
show examples
grown within the farms of Almaty.
This
showed a a significant rise in
city’s
Correct article usage
the city’s
show examples
economy
in just a month
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
200%. In summary, promoting local
food
woud
Correct your spelling
would
enhance
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
nationally and provide more
work space
Correct your spelling
workspace
show examples
for
populace
Add an article
the populace
show examples
. Reducing
imports
in
Add the comma(s)
, in
show examples
turn, would lower
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
emissions
and preserve
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
from global ecological problems.
Submitted by zhaniya.azhdarova on

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task achievement
Your essay covers the main points of the topic and provides a complete response. However, try to deepen your examples and explanations to make your points more convincing. For instance, provide specific statistics or studies to support your claims about environmental impact and economic benefits.
coherence cohesion
The essay is logically structured and easy to follow. Ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next by using transitional phrases. Additionally, consider splitting some of your longer sentences for clarity and readability.
task achievement
The essay addresses the question directly and maintains a clear position throughout.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are effectively presented, framing the argument well.
coherence cohesion
Key points are well-organized and each paragraph presents a single main idea.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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