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Band 5

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be change, while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both and give your opinion.

#activity #impact #plants #animals #world #people #change #actions
It is considered by some that humans are responsible for having detrimental
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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 on plants and
animals
 which cannot be altered,
while
 there are many
people
 who think that
this
 behaviour can be mitigated by introducing some actions for individuals. I opine that the onus should be on
human
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a human
the human
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 who can make an effort to protect our biodiversity by considering it as a part of their life. On the one hand, some
people
 think that human activities are having
negative
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a negative
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 impact on plants and
animals
 because they are often unaware of the consequences.
For example
,
people
 frequently dispose of food waste in plastic bags or cut down trees to build more houses, without considering the harm
this
 causes to
animals
 that ingest plastic or the importance of forests in maintaining ecological balance.
Therefore
, I believe that any efforts to address these issues might be futile, as
people
 are too preoccupied with their own lives to pay attention to environmental concerns.
On the other hand
,
this
 phenomenon can be tackled by imposing some actions to
get
Verb problem
make
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 significant changes.
Firstly
, higher authorities can spread awareness about the importance of proper waste disposal by encouraging
people
 to separate plastic and organic waste.
Secondly
, initiatives like dedicating a special day each month for planting trees or caring for
animals
 in local communities could foster a sense of responsibility among individuals.
However
, I strongly feel that human
being
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beings
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 will not
involve
Wrong verb form
be involved
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 in
this
 kind of
activities
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activity
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 unless they do not feel their responsibility towards protecting plants and
animals
.
To conclude
,
although
 human activities are
in
Change preposition
at
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 fault for the endangerment of species and deforestation, I believe that with the right policies and public awareness, we can still make a positive impact.
Nevertheless
, it is essential for
people
 to recognize their role in preserving the environment, and for the government to enforce strategies that encourage active participation.
Submitted by parmarheena277254 on

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task achievement
Try including more detailed and varied examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more persuasive.
task achievement
Ensure all ideas are fully developed and clearly explained, avoiding any potential gaps in reasoning.
coherence cohesion
Consider using a clearer structure within paragraphs to ensure logical progression of ideas.
coherence cohesion
Work on transitions between ideas to maintain smooth flow throughout the essay.
task achievement
The essay presents a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.
coherence cohesion
The ideas are generally clear and easy to understand, and the essay maintains a logical flow.
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