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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table and pie charts below show the number of research students in Australian universities in 2001 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and pie charts below show the number of research students in Australian universities in 2001 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table and chart
provides
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
 key information about the
number
Use synonyms
 of
students
Use synonyms
 in Australian
university
Fix the agreement mistake
universities
show examples
 during nine years from 2001 to 2010. The table clearly
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of international research
students
Use synonyms
 in 2010 was more than in 2001. During the period, the local research
students
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
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both male and female
was
Verb problem
had
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 the
highst
Correct your spelling
highest
number
Use synonyms
 in the university. In 2001, the international research
students
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around
Add a missing verb
were around
show examples
 13%.
Linking Words
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
male was double
than
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct determiner usage
that
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female
Change preposition
of female
show examples
.
Howevre
Correct your spelling
However
, in 2010 the international
students
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 increased and became 27%.
In addition
Linking Words
, from 2001 to 2010 the local
students
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 decreased in both
gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
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. In
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
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, change is nearly 10%.
In the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 same
statution
Correct your spelling
situation
station
 happen
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
female
students
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the total
number
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 of
students
Use synonyms
 studying in Australian universities in the 9 years became higher, special in the international
students
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the male in all years
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the local or international
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 more than
femal
Correct your spelling
female
females
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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