Some people think that in order to produce a happy society, it isnecessary to ensure that there is only a small difference between the earnings of the richest and poorest. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In modern
society
Add a comma
society,
show examples
the differences between the
rarnings
Correct your spelling
earnings
of the richest and poorest
people
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
been an issue that sparks considerable debate amongst
people
. A majority of
people
believe that it is necessary to be
small
Add an article
a small
show examples
difference
in the earnings between
people
. I strongly agree with
this
view
and in
this
essay will provide
reasons
and
example
Fix the agreement mistake
examples
show examples
to
support
my opinion. First of
all
Add a comma
all,
show examples
there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
multitude
Add an article
a multitude
show examples
of
reasons
why some
people
support
the
view
of should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
be only
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
difference
in earnings between
people
in order to
prodoce
Correct your spelling
produce
the
happinies
Correct your spelling
happiness
specefically
Correct your spelling
specifically
the
people
who have low incomes
for
example
, Two children in school one of them
his
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
father has a high
sallary
Correct your spelling
salary
and used to provide to his child newest mobile and the father of the other child has a low
sallary
Correct your spelling
salary
and his child demanding him to bring new mobile just like his friends and it will be hard for the father to bring the
newst
Correct your spelling
newest
mobile
furthermore
,
people
in society will have same
intresets
Correct your spelling
interests
and that
directrly
Correct your spelling
directly
will affect
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
happiness.
it is clear that
there are many
reasons
support
Wrong verb form
supporting
show examples
the
view
of
Change preposition
that
show examples
should
Correct pronoun usage
there should
show examples
be only
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
difference
between the
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
of the richest and
poorest
Correct article usage
the poorest
show examples
.
in
Change preposition
On
show examples
the other hand, there are a
littany
Correct your spelling
litany
of
reasons
make
same
Correct your spelling
some
show examples
people
disagree with
view
Add an article
the view
show examples
of
Change preposition
that
show examples
it should ensure there is only a small
difference
between the
earning
Fix the agreement mistake
earnings
show examples
if
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
the
people
. The primary cause of
this
view
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
, the idea did not
support
the economics of the countries
for
example
, when
people
see their friends
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
a high income that will make
him
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
work hard to increase
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
income like the others which will reflect on the
economi
Correct your spelling
economy
economic
and might open new opertiunity for the
people
,
lastly
it is evident that there are
reasons
makes the
people
thinking in
this
way. in conclusion, it is evident based on the
reasons
and
example
provided in the essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
firmly agree in the
view
thinks it is necessary to
Correct your spelling
ensure
esure
Correct your spelling
ensure
that there is
Correct your spelling
only
one
onle
Correct your spelling
only
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
difference
in the earnings between
rishist
Correct your spelling
richest
resist
and
poorest
Correct article usage
the poorest
show examples
people
Submitted by ziyadalkhudier on

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clear comprehensive ideas
To improve clarity and comprehension, consider breaking down complex sentences into simpler ones. This will help your ideas come across more clearly and make it easier for readers to follow your argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
It is important to proofread your essay to correct spelling and grammatical errors. For example, words like 'sallary' should be 'salary', 'happinies' should be 'happiness', etc. Correcting these will make your essay more polished and professional.
complete response
Your main points and examples support your argument well, but be sure to elaborate a bit more on each point. Providing more detailed explanations for each example will strengthen your argument.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction clearly states your position on the issue and sets the stage for the rest of the essay. This is very effective in guiding the reader through your arguments.
relevant specific examples
You provided relevant specific examples to support your argument, such as the example of children with different income backgrounds and their struggles with comparing possessions.
introduction conclusion present
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your position, helping to reinforce your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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